Atonement (The Atonement Series) by Elle Chardou Page B

salary.”
    “Yeah but that isn’t something I have to worry about, now is it? It’s not like we’re ever gonna be a couple and even if I did get all that shit, I have enough money to support my family so we wouldn’t have to live on the money I make from my two jobs.”
    I sighed with exasperation. “You are one of the most infuriating people in the world sometimes.”
    “Why? Because I don’t want to be like you?”
    My expression changed and my eyes immediately went cold. “I’m not asking you to be like me because you could never be like me. Yes, you’ve lost a parent but your mother died of cancer. She wasn’t run over by some crazed drunk driver who left her broken body on the asphalt to be found by the police and paramedics. You will never know what it’s like to be me and don’t ever think you have a clue what I am going through because you don’t and you never will.”
    “Listen, I didn’t mean it like that…” he trailed off.
    I finished the rest of my ale and set the bottle on the table. “Don’t worry about it—I’m off to bed. Talk to you in the morning.” I stood and walked to my guest bedroom.
    One I was there, I slipped on a cute flannel sleep shirt and crawled into bed. I knew my behavior was a bit over the top but there was always tomorrow and I could apologize then.

Chapter Eight

     
    I AWOKE WITH a start and for a moment, I thought it was morning already. It wasn’t; I grabbed my Android and realized it was only shortly after one in the morning and next to me in a pair of black boxer shorts and matching wife-beater, was Colin. This made me sit up with a start before I shook him rougher than I intended to and he stirred slowly before he opened his eyes.
    Regardless of the fact he was half asleep, a thin line of drool marked his cheek and his hair was completely mussed, he still looked sexy as hell and I cursed my stupid female hormones.
    “What are you doing in here?” I inquired, burying my own shame with a cool tone that didn’t completely eradicate my own lust.
    “Sorry. I felt bad about what happened and I came in here after we had our first fight. I wanted to talk to you but you were sleep so I just crawled next to you and watched you sleep. Before I knew it, I was sleep too. I didn’t try anything, I swear,” he replied, the sleep in his voice still palpable.
    “I didn’t think you had.” I ran my hands through my tousled hair before I lay down. “You can get underneath the covers you know. We are both adults and well over the age of twenty-one. I have no false illusions you are going to attack me just because we are sharing the same bed. You sleep on your side and I’ll sleep on mine.”
    Colin slipped underneath the covers in a weary manner before he turned toward me and stared at me with those blue eyes of his which could make that twisted knife in my heart melt. “Listen, I’m sorry. You’re right. I need to stop hiding as much as you needed to and I am scared of failure. I’m so terrified I will never live up to Liam and it just…it’s overwhelming sometimes. You have no idea what it’s like to live in his shadow because he has always been so awesome and I have been so…goddamn ordinary.”
    I slipped on the lamp next to my bed. It carried a low-watt lighting throughout the room, soothing rather than garish. “Listen, I may not have had to live up to an older sibling but I have had Caitlyn and let me tell you something about my perfect blonde sister. She did everything right and I couldn’t ever do anything she did. I hated the comparison. It’s probably why I wouldn’t work for Amazon if they were the only company in Seattle. I’d never measure up because everyone would always compare me to Cait and I don’t want that shit.
    “I mean, don’t get me wrong. I certainly don’t have your issues because I know Cait and she is far from perfect. She watches her weight like a hawk because she is prone to weight gain and I can eat anything I want.