Awkwardly Ever After by Marni Bates Page B

But it also wasn’t exactly romantic. I mean, best-case scenario? He would forgive me and then we would have to awkwardly discuss our schedules in an attempt to seal it with a kiss.
    My pulse raced so quickly at the thought of finally feeling his lips against mine, I very nearly backed out of my own plans.
    In some ways a rejection from Dylan would be worse than having my dad pretend his drinking wasn’t a problem. My dad was a permanent fixture in my life and for all his flaws, I knew he loved me unconditionally. But Dylan?
    It was entirely possible that I had already used up his patience.
    I was already sick of dealing with myself.
    But hey, he had managed to like me even after I shut him down right after the party. He had even tried to chat with me—twice—at his house. So maybe it wasn’t a total lost cause.
    Then again, all of that had happened before I had pointed out that I didn’t want to be seen in public with him. Hard to imagine him just shrugging that one off. In fact, it was hard to see him wanting to speak to me at all. Ever.
    It wasn’t like he would have any trouble finding someone to replace me in his affections either. There was probably a whole host of girls in his class who’d be perfectly willing to stand in the bleachers during his soccer games so they could see him flash a wild grin beneath a coat of mud.
    I had to keep repeating to myself that if he wanted someone else, I would be happy for him. I would back off gracefully. I wouldn’t be as selfish as he had accused me of being yesterday. If he didn’t want me back, well, that might not be the worst thing to happen to him, considering that I was a mess.
    And I wasn’t trying to hide that fact from myself anymore.
    I kept my head down at school the next day and avoided Mackenzie at all costs so that I wouldn’t be tempted to dig into how Dylan was doing in the wake of all the dad drama that had just gone down at their house.
    I couldn’t avoid Isobel, though.
    â€œYou have no idea what you got me into,” she hissed as she dragged me away from my locker and the prying ears of a small group of wannabe Notables who might try to climb their way into the in crowd by shoving us further down the social ladder.
    â€œYeah, about yesterday . . . I owe you an apology.”
    Isobel’s eyes were frantic. “An apology?!” she choked. “Oh, you owe me a whole lot more than that! You talked me into going to Mackenzie’s house only to ditch me with Spencer King !”
    Ouch. Yeah, I definitely wasn’t going to be getting a best friend of the year mug.
    â€œAny chance the two of you got along brilliantly?”
    Isobel shoved her glasses up her nose, but the lens did nothing to obscure the withering glare she shot me. “You also didn’t take any of my phone calls!”
    I was tempted to tell her why. To explain that I had spent the night grieving for a father I would never have. That I’d been busy trying to tamp down the brutal, gnawing ache in my heart while simultaneously working up the courage to face my fears. To start making the kinds of decisions I’d look back on without regret.
    But I still should have answered my phone.
    Ignoring my best friend in her time of need wasn’t exactly a source of pride. No doubt about it, I had dropped the ball.
    â€œSo what did the two of you talk about in the car?”
    Isobel glanced furtively around us and then apparently decided that it still wasn’t safe enough to disclose such top-secret information.
    â€œSomething that will probably lead to my death,” she mumbled.
    I rolled my eyes. “A bit dramatic, don’t you think?”
    â€œNot really. Steffani Larson never struck me as particularly bright, but Ashley McGrady might be able to poison me. She’s probably got access to chemicals at whatever salon turns her orange on a regular basis.”
    â€œYou’re being paranoid, Izzie. You