Believe Like a Child by Paige Dearth Page B

Lea’s apartment were a bucket, a mop and cleaning detergents.
    Lea motioned toward them and said, “Here is some stuff you can use to clean up the place with. Just make sure I get it all back after you’re done. That stuff cost money, ya know.”
    Alessa’s heart felt light as she took everything up to the second floor. She unlocked the door to her first apartment and stepped inside the filthy, dingy kitchen. Nothing could break her spirit today. If necessary, she would scrub and clean until her hands fell off. This was her home now. For the first time ever, Alessa was in charge of her life and it was an invigorating feeling.
    When she finished cleaning several hours later and looked at her watch, it was already two-thirty p.m. Remembering that she had nothing but a donut and a cup of coffee she bought from the street vendor outside the Travelodge, she quickly put her clothes away, locked the door and headed for the Dauphin Mini Market she had spotted while getting off at the bus stop. It was only two blocks from her new home and she was sure she could find a quick bite to eat there. On the way, she walked past groups of young people. Some of them looked like teenagers, but others seemed to be in their twenties. It was immediately obvious to her that other than Lea, she was the only white person on Dauphin Street.
    As she navigated her way through small clusters of people, Alessa heard the guys heckling her and felt the girls looking her up-and-down with morbid hatred. Ignoring everyone around her and clinging to her purse, she pushed ahead in the direction of the mini mart. Don’t let them see that you’re afraid, she kept telling herself. If they find out, they’ll bother you even more. Easier said than done, though. These people were intimidating, to say the least. No one smiled at her. On the contrary, everyone looked like they wanted to bash her brains in. Once inside the mini mart, which now seemed a safer haven than a ten-by-twelve-foot room reeking of rotting cheese, Alessa bought just enough groceries for the next three or four days, mindful of the fact that she would run out of money if she went overboard.
    Having paid for her purchases, she made her way through the heavy glass door protected with black iron bars, only to come up against a wall of six teenagers who stood barring her way. The tallest of them, a gangly guy with gold front teeth, slithered closer and said, “Whatcha got there, girl? You gonna cook me somethin’ good to eat? I could use some loving and I ain’t never had me none of that white meat before.” He turned to his friends and asked, “You think this young girl is sweeter than the meat we get around here?”
    One of the boys yelled back, “I don’t know, Tag, but after you have some of it, I’ll get me some too!”
    Alessa’s heart was pounding so hard she thought it would jump out of her chest. She looked about her frantically and noticed an elderly black woman coming out of the mini mart. Alessa prayed she would stand up for her, but the woman didn’t so much as acknowledge either the girl or the boys who were heckling her; it was as if they were all invisible.
    Trying to sound self-assured and assertive, Alessa said to the boys, “I have to go. Please let me through. I have had enough shit this weekend and I just can’t take anymore. Please just leave me alone.”
    At her words, the tall black guy laughed and said, “You go on tonight, girl. We want you to settle into the neighborhood, but we’ll be around and looking to test out watcha got between those fine legs of yours.”
    He moved to the side and Alessa bolted through. She ran all the way to her apartment building, holding her breath until she was safely inside with her groceries. Once she had shut the front door behind her, she took a deep, ragged breath. She realized this would be tougher than she had initially thought. These people made Denise from the Rope look like a fucking saint.
    Alessa cooked herself