Berlina's Quest by James Hartley Page A

the way Berlina wanted. Berlina and Felistia walked up and down the row, paying special attention to the pants the men were wearing. Finally, the two girls turned to each other, and Berlina cast a silence spell, so they could talk without being heard by the farmer and his men.
    â€œWhat do you think, Fee? The shortest ones?”
    â€œNot the one on the end, even if he is the shortest. Did you see the shit on the seat of his pants?”
    â€œYou’re right. I wouldn’t want to wear those. However, the second and third from the short end look fairly clean. Will those do?”
    â€œYes, I think so.”
    Berlina lifted the silence spell, pointed to the two men she and her companion had chosen, and said, “Take off your pants.”
    The two looked at Berlina, and one of them said, “No. No.”
    Berlina repeated, more forcefully, “Take off your pants.”
    When the two still just stood there, the farmer said, “Do as she says. Otherwise, she may kill us all.”
    The two men removed their pants. The girls blushed slightly at the revelation that among farmhands, male undergarments were conspicuous by their absence. Berlina took the pants and handed one to Felistia. The men stood there, hands at their groins, trying to hide the fact that undressing in front of two women caused them to exhibit the gallant reflex. Berlina ignored them and led Felistia into the barn.
    When they emerged a few minutes later, they were wearing the pants, and had their skirts tucked up around their waists. “We should be able to ride bareback, now. Don’t you agree?” Berlina asked the farmer. He just nodded.
    The three mounted the horses, making sure that Lathan was on the largest and strongest one, and started to ride off. As they got to the edge of the farm, Berlina looked back. The farmer was trying to get his men—at least the six who still had pants—back out in the fields with little success. Berlina, Felistia, and Lathan proceeded eastward at a slow walk.
    â€œCan’t we get da horses to go, like, faster?”
    â€œNot these horses,” said Berlina. “If we try to go much faster, we’ll kill them. When we get to a town, I’ll see if I can trade these three in for three better ones…with saddles.”
    â€œGeese, how are yu gonna do dat, still wid no money?”
    â€œSimple enough, Lathan. Just what we did here…we’ll steal them. We’ll steal three good horses. Only this time, we’ll leave these nags in their places and call it a ‘trade’. With luck, we’ll be out of town before our little peccadillo is discovered. That’s why we need to eat first. Then, we’ll do our horse trading.”
    â€œOkay, youse is da boss, Princess.”
    Berlina leaned over to Felistia and whispered, “Is it just me, or does this guy get a little exasperating at times?”
    Felistia just laughed.
    As they approached the town, one of the first buildings was a tavern with three horses tethered in front of it. “What luck,” said Berlina. “See those three? They are wearing decorative barding in the maroon and orange colors of Prince Drailsen. I can hardly think of any horses I’d rather steal.”
    The three went over and tethered the nags to the rail, then went inside. Except for the bartender, the place was empty. Berlina went up to the bar and ordered three meals.
    â€œMoney?” asked the bartender.
    Berlina exhibited a gold coin, and the bartender nodded. He scooped out three plates full of whatever it was he had in a large, cast iron pot, apparently some kind of stew, and took the plates to a table.
    â€œThis place seems kind of empty,” Berlina said to the bartender. “There are three horses outside. We expected to see their riders in here.”
    â€œOh, well. They are here but upstairs. They ate, and just a few minutes ago, they took all three of my barmaids upstairs for a tumble. As long