Between the Lives by Jessica Shirvington Page A

again.’
    All those phone calls.
    Desperate, I leapt onto the bed, thinking that if I could get to the other side I might have a chance at pushing past my father and Dr Meadows.
    But the male nurse had anticipated the move. He was on me mid-jump, slamming me onto the bed, keeping me down as I struggled.
    Dr Meadows moved further into the room. ‘Sabine. We’re here to help. Please, let us help,’ he said.
    The woman dashed around to the side of the bed and went for my arms. But as she grappled with my cast, I leveraged against the mattress, bucked my body and kicked the guy in the face.
    He stumbled back, and the woman’s grip loosened as her attention focused on him. I used the advantage, ripping my arms from her hold and pushing her back a few steps. I bounded off the bed, past Dr Meadows, who didn’t try to stop me, and straight into my father, who instantly grabbed my upper arms, his right hand squeezing hard on the cut he knew was there. I couldn’t hold back the cry of pain. He ignored me and simply manoeuvred me into a reverse bear hug, pinning my arms to my sides.
    It hurt in so many ways. I sagged in his arms.
    Nurse guy staggered back to his feet, blood dripping down his face. I’d gotten my foot right in his nose. The woman had righted herself too. She was no longer bothering with the ‘we can be friends’ look. She’d moved on to a big-ass syringe and a look that said: I’m gonna enjoy this .
    ‘I warned you she might be violent,’ my father said, ignoring my attempts to struggle against his tight hold.
    ‘Yes,’ Nurse guy replied flatly. ‘I suggest we sedate her now.’
    ‘But Dr Levi was going to see her immediately,’ my father argued.
    Nurse guy used the edge of his white jacket to wipe the blood off his face and stared at Dr Meadows, who took his cue and turned to my father. ‘I think it would be best for all involved if we could get her safely to the clinic. It’s a fast-working sedative, but it won’t last too long.’ He waited for my father’s approval.
    ‘Mom!’ I screamed.
    ‘Sedate her,’ my father said quickly.
    ‘Mom!’ I screamed again.
    She came into the hall, but stayed at the far end, leaning against the wall as if she needed the support. She was crying, covering her face with her hands.
    ‘Why didn’t you tell us you were so unhappy?’ she said in a broken tone. ‘How long, Sabine? How long have you been having these thoughts?’
    ‘Mom, I swear to you, I’m not crazy. Make them stop. I’ll explain. I’ll … I can prove it to you!’
    ‘Hurry up,’ my father pushed. I twisted my head and shot him a look of pure hate. Nurse guy moved in to help hold me still. I’d endured being a kid for so much longer than any normal person – endured the rules, curfews, judgment – but this … this was demoralising in the extreme.
    ‘You need to listen to me! God, just for once stop thinking about yourselves and listen!’
    I could hear Mom’s gasp from the other end of the hall, but she said nothing and made no move to help me.
    I shook my head. It was hopeless. ‘I never should’ve told you,’ I said brokenly.
    I jolted one last time against my father, trying more to hurt him than free myself and then glared at my mother.
    ‘I should’ve just done it!’
    No one missed the meaning. It even surprised me.
    ‘Would you get on with it!’ my father snapped at the woman. To me he simply said, ‘You’ll thank us for this one day.’
    The woman moved towards me. Some of the earlier hate in her eyes had gone and was replaced by something much worse. Sympathy. It got my back up.
    ‘Don’t feel left out,’ I sneered at her. ‘I promise to give your face the same makeover as his.’ I glanced at her colleague who was still dabbing at the blood coming from his nose.
    Her eyes narrowed, her compassion quickly dissolving. The needle went into my arm and in seconds everything began to blur.
    It was a bitter realisation: the confirmation that for all these years,