Bone Cage by Catherine Banks Page B

they’re not too bright.
    CHICKY
    How in the hell would anyone in this place know? The most
    intelligent person in the world could live next to them and they wouldn’t know it. A saint could move into the village and no one would give a shit. Mother Theresa could rise from the dead, go to
    a dance at the firehall to bless the goddamn works of them, and
    I bet all Jamie would do is crack jokes about her tits.
    JAMIE starts walking along the bridge rail.
    KRISTA
    Why are you so down on him? To me, too.
    I’m marrying him in six days you know.
    CHICKY
    It’s not too late to change your mind.
    KRISTA notices JAMIE.
    KRISTA
    Sit down, Jamie.
    CHICKY
    You know he’s going to do it if you watch him.
    KRISTA
    Well I told him when we’re married he ain’t jumping off the high no more.
    CHICKY
    When you two are married it will be you up there doing the death dance.
    Hey, Kev!
    Kevin. Hey!
    JAMIE
    Hey, Kev, she wants you, man.
    CHICKY
    Throw me a smoke.
    JAMIE sits down. KEVIN takes out a smoke without letting go of the bridge.
    There is the sound of a car engine wide open squealing through the village.
    JAMIE
    F’ing Merv asshole.
    A-HOLE!
    KEVIN
    They asked me up to their camp tonight.
    JAMIE
    Merv did?
    KEVIN
    Not just Merv, there’s a bunch of them.
    JAMIE
    That’s one place you don’t want to go.
    KEVIN
    Just a bunch playing cards.
    JAMIE
    They’re looking for someone to get ugly at.
    CHICKY
    Kev, my smoke.
    KEVIN
    It’s coming.
    He throws one but CHICKY steps on it by mistake.
    Shit.
    They just drink and play cards.
    He throws down the package with the lighter tucked inside.
    JAMIE
    Don’t go.
    KEVIN
    You go.
    JAMIE
    Yeah but I’m me and you’re you.
    You go up there and you’ll come home one sorry ass.
    KEVIN
    I’m not going to fight nobody.
    JAMIE
    You go up there and I’ll beat the crap out of you myself.
    KEVIN
    Fuck you. I can go anywhere I want. I can take care of myself.
    JAMIE
    So you think.
    KEVIN
    Yeah well, I know something about you, don’t I?
    JAMIE
    What?
    KEVIN
    I ain’t telling.
    JAMIE shifts his weight so he is within striking distance of KEVIN, while pretending to hand him an empty beer bottle.
    JAMIE
    Is it about my stag?
    KEVIN
    Maybe. Maybe not. I ain’t telling you.
    JAMIE
    I’m going to be your sweet brother-in-law, you better tell me.
    KEVIN
    F you!
    JAMIE grabs KEVIN and pulls him into a headlock. He begins to tug on KEVIN’s arm to get him away from his hold on the bridge.
    I ain’t telling you.
    JAMIE succeeds in pulling him from the side.
    JAMIE
    Hope you can swim.
    KEVIN is very afraid.
    KEVIN
    Let go of me, man.
    JAMIE
    Think you know where that little hole is, that you’ve got to hit when you jump from here, or else your spine goes…
    JAMIE snaps his fingers in quick succession as KEVIN struggles.
    Just like that!
    KEVIN
    Let go let go let go of me.
    KRISTA
    Kev, you come down here.
    CHICKY
    Krista! Christ, Jamie’s throwing Kevin off the bridge, not the other way ’round.
    Fuzzy!
Jamie
. Let him alone
right now
!
    JAMIE
    She wants me to let go of you, Kev, should I?
    KEVIN
    I’m going to fall, Jamie… I’m gonna fall!
    JAMIE
    Better tell me.
    KEVIN
    It ain’t about your stag, okay?
    JAMIE
    What then?
    What, Kev, I’ll drop you.
    KEVIN
    I’ll tell ya, I’ll
tell
ya. I’m telling you, man. Just don’t get mad at me when you hear it.
    JAMIE
    You tell me, I’ll decide who to get mad at.
    KEVIN
    I heard Earl saying at the dance that he’s putting you on
    chainsaw for the summer.
    JAMIE
    No he ain’t. You don’t make shit on chainsaw.
    KEVIN
    Starting the Monday after your wedding, he said.
    JAMIE fakes it one last time like he’s going to drop KEVIN, then
    slowly lets go of him.
    JAMIE
    That’s funny, I’m giving my week’s notice this Monday.
    KEVIN scrambles out of reach.
    CHICKY
    Kevin, get your ass down here.
    JAMIE
    She