Butter Safe Than Sorry by Tamar Myers Page A

bleacher--with a military jet flying maneuvers overhead.
    "Really, Miss Yoder, your behavior at the moment is a bit over-the-top."
    "Uh-oh," the Babester said.
    "Uh-oh," my little man said.
    Nobody likes to be chided, much less in front of others, and least of all by a complete stranger. Okay, so maybe some folks go in for public scoldings, but certainly not this mild-mannered Mennonite woman. At the moment my hackles were hiked so high, they scratched my armpits.
    "You are absolutely right," I said to Olivia Zambezi, as I settled back into my seat. "Gabe, darling, pull the cloth down at your end."
    "Sure thing, hon."
    "And you, dear," I said to Olivia Zambezi, whilst smiling broadly, "are a lovely bunch of Huafa mischt ."
    "Why, thank you."
    "Think nothing of it," I said brightly.
    "What's Huafa mischt ?" Barbie Nyle just had to chirp.
    "It must be flowers," George Nyle said. "Probably roses."
    "Papa," my littlest troublemaker said, "why did Mama call the old lady a bunch of horse poop?"

    It was one thing for the New Jersey gang of six to suddenly decide that they preferred to drive all the way back into Bedford for pizza, but they didn't have to invite Surimanda Baikal to go with them. Although what really took the cake was when the Babester asked if he and Little Jacob could tag along. Permission was granted as long as he brought dessert home with him, which he was more than happy to do.
    So there I was, alone and abandoned, a hapless orphan waif (indeed, my adoptive parents are dead, squished as they were in that horrible tunnel accident). All this pain and sorrow, this tsuris , just because I wanted to say a proper grace before eating. Was that really too much to ask? Okay, so perhaps I'd been out of line with the Huafa mischt comment, but I'd had a hard life; and Gabe should have stuck by me--no matter what. Isn't that what marriage was all about?
    Yes, I know, life is hard for all of us, but for me it has been particularly hard. Who but me could understand the trauma of being just shy of twenty-seven and having to shop for a pair of coffins, each over four feet wide, but only two inches high? Even just recalling that horrible day caused me to throw back my head and commence howling.
    "Nobody knows the trouble I've seen. Nobody knows but Jesus."
    Someone tapped me on the shoulder.

10

    Rosemary Blue Cheese Ice Box Cookies

Ingredients

    21/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon salt
12 ounces blue cheese, 1 softened
1 cup (2 sticks) butter, softened
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 cup dried cranberries, finely chopped
11/2 cups nuts (pecans or walnuts), chopped
1 to 2 tablespoons fresh rosemary, leaves only
white or natural sanding (coarse) sugar

Cooking Directions

    Whisk together flour, cornstarch, and salt in a bowl; set aside. Cream together blue cheese and butter with an electric mixer. Add sugar and beat until light and fluffy. Slowly add flour mixture to butter and cheese mixture; beat to combine. Add cranberries and mix on low just until evenly dispersed.

    Divide the dough into two pieces and use parchment paper or plastic wrap to form the dough into two 11/2- inch-diameter round or square logs. Set out two fresh pieces of plastic wrap and sprinkle the chopped nuts evenly over both. Roll the logs of dough in nuts until covered. Tightly wrap and seal the logs; refrigerate until firm (at least 2 hours). Preheat oven to 325degF. Working with one log at a time, unwrap and slice logs into 1/4- inch discs. Place 1 inch apart on parchment-lined baking sheets. Gently press about 3 small rosemary leaves on each cookie. Sprinkle each cookie with sanding sugar.

    Bake on a middle rack until bottoms begin to brown and tops just begin to turn from pale to golden; 12 to 18 minutes. Cool on sheets 1 to 2 minutes before removing cookies to a cooling rack to cool completely. Store cookies in an airtight container for up to 1 week.

    Courtesy http://www.eatwisconsincheese.com/

11

    I shrieked, and because