ClarenceBN by Sarah M. Anderson Page B

options, “I’m not that sorry. Why didn’t you call, at least? You can’t show up after five years and expect to us to fall all over ourselves to accommodate you.”
    Mikey’s grip tightened around her neck. Sorry, honey , she thought, rubbing his back. But suddenly she had to do this—had to show him that she wasn’t just waiting on him—that he’d never be her knight in shining armor.
    “You sound like your sister,” Ezra stated flatly.
    “Did it ever occur to you that she might be right? You left me. You left us , Ezra. Do you even have an excuse for that? Or was it just cowardice?”
    “I wasn’t a coward,” he snapped. “I joined the Army. I did two tours in Afghanistan. I’m a warrior. Unlike your ‘friend’ there,” he added, using air quotes, as if Clarence could be diminished by this opinion of him.  
    “My ‘friend’ is my boyfriend, Ezra. And he was in the Navy for ten years. He’s a good man who takes care of people. Of us ,” she added, hugging Mikey tightly. “So, if I were you, I’d think twice about mocking the best man on this rez. He’s already thrown you out once.”
    Mikey started to cry. Tammy did not get upset very often and she felt bad for losing her temper right now in front of him but she’d always dreamed of what she might say to Ezra if he ever came back.
    Funny, this was not how she’d thought it’d go.
    “I need to get back to work,” she repeated. “If you’d like to come to dinner, you’re welcome. Your son is an amazing boy and he should know you. But if you thought that you could just roll back onto this rez and we’d be here waiting with open arms, well, I’m sorry. I put my son first.”
    Ezra stared at her as if he’d never seen her before. Tammy certainly felt like it. She wasn’t the same naïve, hopeful girl she’d been. It wasn’t that she was older, although she was. But she’d fought her own battles, her own personal war between poverty and single motherhood and she’d made it as best she could without him.
    “I thought you’d be glad to see me,” he said in a quiet voice. “I thought . . .”
    “You thought wrong.” She took a deep breath, still rubbing Mikey’s back. “I still live with my mom. And Tara,” she added, figuring she owed him at least that much warning. When he made a face of disdain, she told him, “I couldn’t afford my own place once I had Mikey,” because that was his fault, too.  
    If only he’d stayed . . .
    Well, then she’d be stuck with him. Saddled with a resentful, immature boy-man who didn’t know how to be a father or a good lover.
    “Come by for dinner.” She knew it’d be a disaster one way or the other. If Clarence showed up, Tammy would spend the whole time making sure the two men didn’t fight like toddlers over a favorite toy. And even if Clarence stayed home, Tara would be in super-bitch mode.
    “Yeah.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Okay.”
    Tammy watched as he turned, got into a rusted-out Jeep and drove off.  
    “Honey, I’m sorry,” Tammy said in a soothing voice as she watched Ezra drive away.
    Would he show up for dinner tonight? Or would he bail again?  
    Either way, she was going to be sorry.
    *****
    Clarence did not watch Ezra and Tammy through the door. Dr. Mitchell was giving him the look, patients were piling up, and besides, Tara was doing plenty of watching and adding color commentary to her play-by-play.
    “He’s turning,” she announced as Clarence tried to focus on taking an older man’s blood pressure. “He’s getting in his car—what a piece of junk!—and—okay, he’s gone.”
    The whole Clinic seemed to breathe a sigh of relief at that. “Women,” the older patient said with a sympathetic nod of his head. “Yours?”
    “Yeah,” Clarence muttered, trying once again to keep count of the beats per minute and failing.
    “Women,” the man said again. “But then again, they’re worth it, eh?”
    Clarence tried to smile at the old coot, but