Clean Break by Jacqueline Wilson Page B

fat old Em and you’re not a silly little sausage like Maxie.’
    Vita giggled. ‘Yes, he
is
a silly little sausage,’ she said. She paused. ‘Em’s a
bit
pretty. She’s got lovely hair.’
    â€˜She’s got a lovely nature too, putting up with a sister like you,’ I said.
    â€˜When Dad comes next time I’m going to be much much nicer to him,’ said Vita, snuffling. ‘So long as he doesn’t bring that Sarah!’
    â€˜She’s horrible,’ I agreed. ‘Dad’s gone mad, liking her better than Mum.’
    â€˜When I’m married I’m not going to let my husband run off,’ said Vita.
    â€˜I’m not going to get married at all,’ I said. ‘It’s too easy to pick the wrong person. I’m going to liveall by myself and I’m going to eat all my favourite things every day and stay up as late as I like, and I shall read all day and write stories and draw pictures with no one bothering me or fussing or needing to be looked after.’
    â€˜Won’t you be lonely?’ said Vita.
    â€˜I shall have a friendly dog and a little cat to curl up on my lap. My sister Vita will come visiting riding on Dancer the Reindeer with her good kind obedient husband and six pretty little girls, and my brother Maxie will come visiting with his big bold wife and his six silly little sausage boys and so I will have more than enough company, thank you.’
    â€˜Will Mum come visiting too?’
    â€˜Yes, of course. I’ll take her on holiday and make her happy.’
    â€˜And Dad?’
    â€˜He’ll come too,’ I said. ‘He’ll have made this fantastic Hollywood movie and be ever so rich and famous so he’ll have his own special holiday beach house. We’ll all go and stay, and swim and laze on the beach and be happy happy happy.’
    â€˜Happy happy happy,’ Vita murmured. Then she was still, suddenly asleep.
    I lay awake for a long time, trying to tell stories to myself. I could make them seem real enough to comfort Vita, but it was much harder trying toconvince myself. I eased Dancer off Vita’s hand and made her stroke my head with her furry paws.
    â€˜Cheer up, dear old Em,’ Dancer said. ‘Don’t you start crying now. Chin up, big smile, that’s my girl. Now, close your eyes and snuggle down and go fast asleep. Fast asleep. Fast fast asleep.’
    I didn’t manage to go
fast
asleep. It was a very
slow
process, and even then I still woke up very early. I decided to fix myself a bowl of cornflakes and have a private early breakfast with my book. I was rereading
Elsie No-Home
by Jenna Williams. Elsie was good fun, even though she told terrible jokes. I understood exactly how she felt having to look after her little sister and brother all the time.
    Mum was sitting at the kitchen table in her nightie, sipping a cup of tea. We both jumped. Mum spilled half her cupful into her black nylon lap.
    â€˜I’m sorry, Mum! I didn’t mean to startle you,’ I said quickly, scared she might get cross with me again.
    â€˜It’s not your fault, Em,’ said Mum. ‘Oh come here, love. Don’t look so worried. I’m sorry I’ve been so snappy with you.’
    She dabbed at her nightie and then I climbed onto her damp lap. I must have really squashed her but she didn’t complain. She held me and rocked me like a little baby.
    â€˜My Em,’ she said. ‘What would I do withoutyou, eh? We’ve come through thick and thin together, you and me, babe. Do you remember your real dad?’
    â€˜A bit,’ I said cautiously. I didn’t like remembering.
    â€˜Whenever he yelled or hit me you’d come and find me crying. You’d put your chubby little arms round me and tell me not to cry, remember? You’ve always looked after me, Em. And now you look after Vita and Maxie too.’
    â€˜So I’m not really useless?’
    â€˜Oh