Girl Trouble by Miranda Baker Page A

want to control the way I see you. Remember when I tried to read your emotions at Alisa’s wedding and couldn’t even slip in through a crack?”
    Bonita’s cheeks heated at the memory of their fake make-out session when Crystal had used her as a decoy date. For a split second, Crystal, with her long, dark hair and bad-girl persona, had reminded her of Kat, and her emotions had snapped out of control. She’d put a lid on them—fast—which had given Crystal a clue to how tightly she controlled her feelings the rest of the time.
    Bonita sighed. “Does that explain why I said no when Kat offered to come out of the closet for me?”
    “Seriously? You said no? That picture in the paper looked like yes to me.”
    “I can’t do it, Crystal. It would ruin her career.”
    “Nothing could touch that juggernaut. Women want her as much as men do.”
    Bonita shook her head. “So says the bisexual psychic. Forgive me, but you don’t exactly have the same viewpoint as mainstream America.”
    “But I’m the one you called for advice,” Crystal said cheerfully. “Suck it up, Buttercup. If you’re going to kick Wesley to the curb, you better come up with a good reason.”
    Bonita snorted. “ Princess Bride analogies—really?”
    “Again…you called me. I’m assuming it’s because you want me to tell you to quit fucking around and be honest with yourself.”
    Even without using her empathic abilities, Crystal knew how to get to the heart of the matter, leaving Bonita no choice but to do the same. “She left me, Crystal. When Kat turned eighteen, she left for Hollywood, and now she says she made a mistake. Twelve years apart, and now she’s like ‘Oh, let’s be together.’ I can’t do it. It hurt so much when she left. Her career was more important than me. I’ve understood that for years, and now she’s changed her mind. What if she changes it back?”
    It would kill her. That was the power Kat held over her, the ability to break her. If she had asked Kat to stay in Norton and Kat had said no… If she had joined Kat in Hollywood when she turned eighteen, and Kat hadn’t wanted her there… If she stayed with Kat now and Kat didn’t want her forever…it would break her. Wasn’t it better not to take the risk?
    Sudden understanding made her shiver, and it had nothing to do with the brisk wind. She walked to dry sand and sank down, defeated. “I’m a control freak.”
    “But you’re a really great control freak, sweetie. You have a successful, well-run business. Your filing system is truly inspired. You’re perfectly put together at all times, never a hair out of place, makeup always immaculate. Nobody messes with you because you’ll crack their gonads and hand them back in perfect pieces. When the pressure to perform gets too much, you go to Johnny’s club and relinquish control for a little while—under very controlled circumstances, of course, just like every good control freak should.”
    Her words, so similar to Kat’s resentful complaint, stung like salt in a wound. “Hey, I already admitted you were right. Why are you rubbing it in?”
    “Because half of an epiphany isn’t going to do you much good. Keep digging… You like control, so what? Why did you say no to Kat?”
    Bonita held very still and let the truth rise to the surface, unimpeded by fear or desire. “I can’t control Kat. She’s a wild card…reckless…impulsive. I never know what she’s going to do. Being with her is a risk, and I hate taking risks. As long as I get to decide when we see each other, I have some control over her.”
    “Good girl.” Crystal’s voice was laced with laughter and deliberate irony.
    “Oh, shut up. If you tell me I fit the submissive profile, I’m going to fire you ,” Bonita grumbled.
    “Are you sure about that? Because ever since you left, my rich boyfriend has been filling my head with all kinds of ways to improve business at Come Again. I was kind of hoping you’d offer to sell me the