Haunting Leigh: A Paranormal Romantic Comedy (Literal Leigh Romance Diaries Book 4) by Melanie James Page A

something about magic Rabbi, my brain did a double take. I lifted my head away from the wall and gave Gertie a puzzled look. “Hold on. Did you say Rabbi Magic Man? Are you sure you didn’t just dream all of this?”
    “No. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a dream. I had a hard time pronouncing his name so I called him Magic Man. It’s kind of cute, don’t you think?”
    “Okay, you mean Rabbi Majikovsky.” I placed my forehead against the wall and resumed my pose of despair. “All right, Gertie, go ahead and finish your story.”
    “Okay. Well, he told me that according to the legends, once you place a special little scroll into its mouth, you have to wait until it wakes up the next morning before it comes alive. I kind of bewitched Rabbi Magic Man into giving me one of those scrolls. I think he called it a Shem. Anyway, today is Charlie’s birthday.”
    I didn’t even bother to lift my head this time. “What? Charlie? Who?”
    “Charlie. He’s my golem. That’s what I named him.”
    “Charlie, yes of course. Why didn’t I think of that? Although, a vicious, homicidal, papier-mâché atrocity would be better suited to a ferocious sounding name.” At least she hadn’t named him Mister Fluffy.
    “I don’t think we should get too worried. After all, he is just made of paper. How much trouble could he really cause?” Gertie’s optimism was a little shaky. “Right, Leigh?”
    “No, those things grow big and strong, at least that’s how the stories go. I’m talking Bigfoot on steroids strong. The papier-mâché is just his base form. Who knows what terrible thing Charlie will become? God forbid he should get ahold of an axe or a sickle like some of the old stories.” I was getting very nervous. Ever since I had a nightmare about a golem, I had done everything I could to prevent this very scenario from happening. Yet, there I was talking about a golem in the school. “Come on, Gertie, forget Clarice, let’s get to the library and see if we can find Charlie, maybe he hasn’t changed yet. Either way, we have to get him out of the school.”
    Our pace quickened and we jogged down the corridor. When we got to the library, we peered in through the large glass panes that made a wall. Gertie was obviously nervous and she began humming some upbeat tune.
    “Shhh, Clarice might hear you.” I whispered. All of a sudden I started to feel a little strange. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but it was like I was mentally detached from reality for a few seconds. I was also slightly nauseous.
    Gertie noticed it also “Leigh? Are you all right? You look sweaty and pale.”
    “I’m not sure. It must be all of the stress getting to me.” Then a new feeling washed over me. I had an uncontrollable urge to get truly mean, and that isn’t me. Oh, I’ve been known to have my share of sarcastic eruptions, but not the likes of what I spouted out next. “Don’t worry about that old bag. Do you want to know what her problem is? It’s her hair. It’s pulled up in that bun so damn tight it’s stretching her entire skin up. Her tits are up on her shoulders. Just imagine what that does to her crotch! She has to unhook her bra just to scratch her ass, it’s up so high.”
    Gertie’s mouth dropped open. She was quite surprised by the folly of filth that sprang from my mouth. “Now you sound like Kelly when she’s having one of those snark attacks of hers.”
    I couldn’t fight the compulsion to crack a couple more one-liners. It would make my Uncle Ron, the insult comic, proud. “It’s true. She’s such a bitch the DMV printed ‘Lost dog, reward offered’ on her driver’s license picture. She is such a bitch. Just last week Purina offered to put her picture on cans of dog food. Yeah, they even did a photo shoot. It didn’t work out. They couldn’t tell her ass from her face.”
    “Jesus! Now you’re being downright insulting, Leigh.”
    “I don’t know what’s gotten into me. Honestly.”
    “Security!