His Californian Countess by Kate Welsh Page A

could show her she was respected and valued. That the gift of her heart was valued. It wasn’t all she deserved, but it was the best he could give.
    Iris’s voice, sharp and vindictive, still rang in his ears. And resounded in his heart. Try though he might, he couldn’t silence her voice or the things she’d said after Meara’s birth. “Love you? Are you a fool? I loved the idea of your title. Who has ever loved you? Your mother? She never knew you! Your father? Was it love that allowed him to take his own life and leave you behind? Your uncle could barely abide being in the same room with you. Your beloved cousin will probably shoot you on sight when next you meet. That nanny you’ve already hired to take care of that worthless whelp I was forced to give birth to? You pay her to love Meara. And you. When did she ever love you when a salary wasn’t forthcoming?”
    The last had been a lie. Mimm had moved halfway across Britain and secured employment at his boarding school and later at Edinburgh to be near him. So why could he not ignore the rest as the ravings of a bitter, spoiled woman?
    Because he feared the rest was true. It sounded true.
    Taking a chance on a future with Amber, Jamie gathered her hand in his. “Don’t be sorry. Just promise to change the situation. Walk with me in the day. Eat meals with me. Share your time with me. That is all that should be required. That, and accept a sincere apology.”
    “I have accepted it,” she said quickly and pulled her hand free of his.
    “I cannot believe that or you would agree to be in my company. I hurt you. Words alone would never take away the sting of all the terrible things that tumbled from my mouth that morning. Had I not hurt you deeply, you would agree to learn who I am and allow me to know who you are.”
    “I have said it, have I not?” she answered and went to turn away. Before she could, he took her shoulders in his hands. For a long moment he tried to equate the delicate bones beneath his palms with the Valkyrie’s heart beating within her and the spine of iron hidden in so delicate a body. He couldn’t have chosen a better mother for Meara had he searched the world.
    Because she didn’t protest the truth in his words, he went on, “Our lovemaking formed a bond between us. We didn’t mean it to happen, but the bond is there, is it not? Don’t we owe it to ourselves to explore this curious state of affairs?”
     
    Amber couldn’t seem to look away from his glittering eyes, her heart pounding with fear over the hidden danger in his question. Of course there was a bond. Those beautiful moments in his cabin had somehow imprinted him upon her very soul. She’d known he was on deck well before he’d spoken. Everything about him stayed in her mind and body like a living thing, possessed of a will its own.
    She would wake in the night, thinking the curls at the nape of his neck lay beneath her hands, only to find her pillow twisted in her fingers. In her dreams those haunting violet eyes drew her to him, then cruelly rejectedher as it became a nightmare. Her breasts would ache after sensual dreams of him being in her bed. It was as if his hard chest with its crisp hair had gently abraded her nipples, making them sensitive for all time. She couldn’t even wish those accursed dreams away. She ached for him.
    She needed what she’d never missed before. What she’d made herself believe she didn’t want. A man. This man.
    With Joseph there had been that nebulous joining in the near future that had worried her and made her curious at the same time. Now she knew the act held nothing—and everything—to worry about.
    Lovemaking had created sensations in her that had blasted her mind into millions of pieces, but still allowed her to think. It held a consequence—a bond, as he called it—that she didn’t want, but that she felt the need of in the depths of her soul.
    There was a look of longing in his eyes and she didn’t think it came only