Hockey Confidential by Bob Mckenzie Page B

to wake me up. I’m an old man now.” [
He laughs.
] So I’d take the ball, I’d have a look up at the 30-second shot clock and I’d just shoot it in and look over the bench, like, “Really?”
    Young John: I know when I played in minor atom, a guy was shadowing me, being really dirty with me. My dad thought it was coming from their coach, and he would tell me to protect myself. They would butt-end or stick me in the nuts. I scored a hat trick in this game. The guy who was sticking me, after I scored, he faked like he was going to slash me in the head. He got a penalty. I didn’t even move, never flinched. I scored again and I said, “What are you going to do now, fake slash me in the head again?”
    BM: How about a goal someone else scored that you wish you scored? Do you have any goal envy?
    Uncle John: I played some minor lacrosse with Brendan Shanahan and he’d say to me, “Show me a fancy goal.” I didn’t score fancy goals; I’d just try to do things the right way. Gary Gait, now there’s a guy who scored some fancy goals. He’d rip a backhand from the top of the power play into the top corner. I wouldn’t even have the guts to try that, especially on the power play. So I’d like to score a Gary Gait backhand from the top of the power play.
    Young John: For me, it would be a goal with great meaning. Maybe because it’s coming up, the Olympics—I would have loved to score Sid’s goal in Vancouver, in Canada, to win Olympic gold for Canada. Either that or Brett Hull scoring a game-winning goal in overtime to win the Stanley Cup. Those are the kinds of goals I dream of scoring.
    Uncle John: I’ve been trying to convince [Young] John to pick up the puck on the blade of his stick and whip it around and bounce it in, like Robbie Schremp did. As a fan, that’s what I’d like to see John do on a shootout shot. What’s the percentage on scoring on a penalty shot or shootout—maybe 20 per cent? I’m surprised you don’t do that.
    Young John: I do it in practice.
    Uncle John: Do you score?
    Young John: Yeah, sometimes.
    Uncle John: See, it’s easy. I’ve seen high school kids do it. Easy. Do it.
    Young John: Now you sound like my dad. My dad can shoot right or left in hockey, both ways, and he always says to me, “Shoot both ways, it’s easy.”
    BM: Most goals you’ve ever scored in one game?
    Uncle John: I think in junior, I once had 12 or 13. In pro, I think the most I ever had was seven. My manager in Buffalo told me that if I get a few goals early and the game is in hand, I really back off and don’t try to score as much. He’s probably right.
    Young John: Once in lacrosse, I had 13 or 14 points, but I don’t recall how many goals. In minor hockey, I’ve scored six or seven goals. That would be the most for me in hockey.
    BM: Outside of your contract that pays you, did anyone—a family member—ever give you money to score a goal?
    Uncle John: Nope, never any money. Maybe a shot in the head if I didn’t score. [
He laughs.
]
    Young John: My dad would just say, “If you don’t get a hat trick, don’t come home.” After the game, we’d pull up and he’d open the door a crack and peek out and say, “How many did you get? Okay, c’mon in, then.”
    BM: Let’s talk celebrations. Do you guys have a go-to celebration?
    Uncle John: I don’t celebrate goals too much. More in practice. I joke around that I’m going to jump up on the glass and really go crazy, and then I score and I just raise my arms. Honestly, excessive celebrating just stirs up the other team. Why would you want to do that?
    Young John: I go through stages. I don’t mind celebrating a goal—nothing too crazy, though. I’ll do the same thing for 20 or 30 games and then switch it up a bit.
    BM: I went through a lot of [Young John’s] goals on