Inner Demon by Jocelynn Drake Page B

burning. I didn’t know if her answer made me feel better or worse. I’d loved Trixie for so long, and we’d had so little time together. We didn’t start dating until after she’d found out the truth about me. I respected her too damn much to take a chance on a relationship without her knowing that I was a warlock. Now I was losing her.
    â€œTrixie,” Eldon said, reminding me that the elf was still here. My arms reflexively tightened around Trixie as if he’d tried to pull her out of my arms. Maybe in a way, he had. He was reminding us both that it was time to go.
    It was an inner struggle but I finally loosened my hold on her and took a step back, even though I kept my hands locked on her forearms. I looked down at her, confident that I’d always remember what she was wearing at that moment. She had on her favorite worn blue jeans with the small hole in the right knee. Her pale blue sweater reminded me of the summer sky on a cloudless day. Beneath the sweater, she wore the black T-­shirt I’d randomly picked up for her as a joke. It had a picture of an animated ninja cat on it because I complained that she moved so quietly around my apartment
    I placed my right hand over her lower abdomen, which was only now starting to show a little bulge. “Do you know what it’s going to be yet?”
    She placed her hand over mine, holding it there. “Not yet. Another month. Maybe a little longer. Do you have any suggestions for names?”
    â€œI do,” I said with a fragile smile, my head popping up to look at her. Releasing her, I knelt down before her so that my face was directly in front of her stomach. I gently placed my hands on either of her hips, my thumbs brushing against her stomach. She was so small and slender in my hands. I’d never get to see her grow large with our child. I shoved the thought away and clung to the happy moment I’d held just a second ago.
    â€œI never told you this, but when I went to see Mother Nature, I met several souls who were living in her . . . place,” I started, struggling for the right words. Mother Nature lived in a sort of energy crossroads, having largely abandoned Earth because of the warlocks and witches making a mess of everything. “There was one soul in particular. He was so very small, so very young. When I saw him, he had curly blond hair and blue eyes. He was beautiful, Trixie. And the moment I held him, I knew he was mine.”
    â€œYou met your son?” Trixie asked in a hushed whisper.
    I looked up to see her expression filled with surprise and wonder. I smiled at her, loving the feel of her hand as her fingers slid through my hair in a reassuring caress. “I think I met our son. The soul of the child I held, I knew he would one day be my son, but I didn’t know who his mother would be. But if the baby you carry is a boy, I think it will be the soul that I met.”
    â€œI hope you’re right,” she said in a strained voice.
    â€œWhen I was with Mother Nature, I called him Squall. Could you . . . ?”
    She nodded, wiping away fresh tears with her free hand. “I’ll honor it.”
    â€œThank you.” Leaning forward, I pressed a kiss to her abdomen while inwardly praying that this wasn’t the closest I ever came to kissing or holding my child. I stayed there for a second, my forehead pressed against Trixie’s stomach as I blinked back the tears and swallowed past the lump that was choking me. My throat was raw and the ache in my chest left me feeling as if my heart had been passed through a meat grinder.
    After several deep breaths, I stood again and took a step back. Trixie was crying openly now, while trying to keep a smile pasted on her lips as if she could reassure me that this was for the best.
    â€œI’ll send pictures and letters somehow. I’ll keep you updated on everything, I promise,” she said in a wavering