Jackal's Dance by Beverley Harper Page B

that his whirlwind courtship had hidden from view. He was moody. He preferred his own company to anyone else’s, including hers. He was never wrong. And in her heart, Thea had to acknowledge that Billy was often selfish, arrogant and lazy. The terrible truth dawned within weeks. Although Thea put on a brave face, she realised that she was looking for excuses. She tried convincing herself that her husband was simply taking time to readjust. After three months, Thea had to face reality. Billy didn’t love her. In fact, the more she thought about it, the more convinced she became that Billy had wanted a wife and dispassionatelychosen the most suitable candidate – her.
    She thought back to their initial visit to Etosha. It had been Billy’s idea to stay at Logans Island. Bumping into the Director of Nature Conservation had been accidental. Or had it? Billy left Thea to her own devices for half a day to spend time with the man. On his return he told her that he’d been offered the job of lodge manager.
    â€˜Talk about being in the right place at the right time,’ he’d enthused. ‘The manager they have now is leaving and they were about to advertise. It was meant to be.’
    Later that evening they were joined by the Director. Thea had thought he was just being polite.
    â€˜I understand you’ve just completed a hospitality course. What area specifically interests you?’
    And a little later. ‘What would
you
do, Thea, to improve the dining room?’ And he’d listened intently while she was speaking theoretically.
    As they said goodnight to him, he’d turned to Thea. ‘Isolation gets to a lot of people but not you I think. That’s good.’
    â€˜What did he mean?’ Thea asked Billy as they made their way to the bungalow.
    â€˜It was a compliment. Just his way of saying that you have maturity.’ Billy kissed her passionately. ‘And I think so too. Let’s go to bed and be very grown up.’
    Thea giggled and quickly forgot the probing conversation.
    But now? Had Billy implied that he was gettingmarried in order to secure the job? Had he married her because the position required a couple?
    Thea thought back to the last time she’d tried to talk to Billy about anything other than work. It had been last month when the realisation dawned that she was very probably pregnant. They were in their cottage, getting ready for bed. Billy took a shower, a sure sign he had sex on his mind. Thea waited for the usual ‘Are you going to have one too?’ before broaching the subject of their relationship, specifically their sexual relationship.
    â€˜I don’t feel like a shower. I’d rather talk.’
    Billy paused, not getting into bed. ‘What about?’ His voice was suddenly wary.
    Thea looked at him. He was wearing boxer shorts and nothing else. Her fingers ached to caress his bronzed skin. She craved the feel of his lips on hers. She shut her mind to these things. ‘You don’t make love to me any more.’
    He looked genuinely surprised. ‘We made love two nights ago.’
    Thea shook her head. ‘We had sex, Billy.’
    â€˜What do you mean?’ His dark eyes narrowed and she knew he was angry.
    â€˜You never say that you love me. You don’t touch me any more. You don’t care if it’s been good for me or not. In fact, you hardly ever speak to me at all.’
    â€˜Don’t be ridiculous.’
    â€˜Well, do you love me?’
    â€˜Of course.’
    â€˜Then tell me.’
    His eyes slid away. ‘You know I do. I don’t have to say it.’
    â€˜Billy,’ she implored. ‘Is it really so difficult to say?’
    He looked back. ‘What is it with women? Okay, I love you. Satisfied?’ He’d changed his mind about getting into bed and gone to sit on their verandah.
    Thea pulled on her robe and joined him. ‘Billy, what is it? What’s