Jay Walking by Tracy Krimmer Page A

four, but that's only walking. I can't imagine hopping up and down as I run for four miles. In high school for gym class a one mile run was required for graduation. It took me almost thirteen minutes. My sides ached and I walked whenever my instructor turned her head. Running isn't for me, as much as I admire those who do. Secretly, though, I wish I could run a 5K or something. "Good for you. How else are things?"
    "Great! I talked to my partner and we're moving along, I think. She found a place to maybe buy and I'm going with her to check it out tomorrow."
    "Oh." I put my head down, not sure if this is jealousy or disappointment. Jay and I aren't dating exclusively. We meet up a few times a week and exercise. It's not a boyfriend/girlfriend thing. He hasn't even kissed me yet. (I don't even blame tuna anymore). If he's involved with someone, I don't want to get into the middle of that. I'll never be the other woman again or get in between a couple. Despite my past, that's not who I am.
    "Is that okay?" He dips his head to look at me.
    "Why wouldn't it be?" I don't want to get sucked into a vortex of emotion filled with jealousy, doubt, and pain. "Where is it?" I ask him to switch the subject.
    "About three miles from my house, so perfect distance wise. I can run to work in the morning! It's off of Fifth and Main, a little place that used to be a hobby shop. We only plan on having three patient rooms, so we don't need a huge space. That works out well for us and allows us to consider many different places. We could rent, but buying is a better investment. Plus, this way we can do whatever we want and not worry about a landlord."
    "That's exciting, Jay. I'm happy for you." And I am. My life may be a mess, but I'm glad things are working out well for him. He's a nice guy and deserves this.
    "You seem a little down. Is everything okay?"  
    We're still standing on the sidewalk, and I recognize we're in the same spot I fell flat on my butt when we first met. I can't answer him truthfully. I'm not ready to tell him yet, despite Amber's urging to do so. "It's complicated." A chicken response, but it works.
    He steps back slightly from me and crosses his arms. "A guy?"
    Oh, great. That I don't know how to answer. I'm single, and I want him to know that. But I don't want to lie either. "Kind of, I guess."
    "It's okay, Chelsea, if it is. We haven't really defined what this is between us." He starts walking, and for a moment I'm afraid he's walking away from me, until I realize he's starting the walk back to my house.
    He's right, though. We haven't discussed it. Do I want to? What if he doesn't want a relationship? And if he does, am I obligated to immediately tell him about James? "I know. I mean, we haven't even kissed." I can't believe I just said that out loud. My pulse is racing ten times faster than when I'm getting a fast paced-walk in.
    Jay stops and grabs my arm. He's firm, yet gentle. "You're right. We haven't."
    I turn toward him. "What?"  
    He leans in and puts his hands on my cheeks, his eyes locked on mine. My heart moves between rapid morse code calling for help and stopping completely in shock and anticipation. I'm sure people walk by, but I don't even pay attention. Those lips I admire from afar are in front of me, coming toward me, and right then and there, they meet mine, soft and tender. He kisses me, right in the middle of the sidewalk for the entire world to see. I've never been kissed in public before and with such determination and purpose.  
    "I think that defines us," Jay says.

chapter thirteen

    This is the best walk ever. We're approaching my block, and we've slowed to a turtle's pace, our hands intertwined, and sneaking in kisses. The kiss on the sidewalk, with cars whizzing by and in plain sight of pedestrians, may be the most amazing kiss in my life. I like Jay a lot and don't want to screw things up, which is exactly why my confession about James is pressing.
    We turn the corner and begin the approach