Lead Me Not by A. Meredith Walters Page B

to kiss my mouth, hiking up her skirt as she climbed me like a goddamned tree, as if sucking my dick gave her the fucking right to expect me to put my cock inside her. I had standards.
    I shoved her away and removed the condom. I tied it at the end and threw it on the floor at her feet. “Do something with that,” I ordered as I zipped up my pants.
    Without another word, or a look in her direction, I left the room and headed back to the dance floor.
    I felt light as air, the drugs working through my system. I wondered if I closed my eyes whether I would float to the ceiling. I bet I could fly away and never come back. And that was exactly what I wanted.
    To go far, far away.
    “Yo, X, have you sold all your shit?” I opened my eyes in annoyance, pissed at whoever was interrupting my temporary moment of insane escapism.
    “What the fuck do you want?” I snarled at the scrawny dude who stood before me, practically quaking in his crappy knockoff Dr. Martens. This piece of shit was now firmly on my bad side.
    The guy grimaced in apology, and I knew he was wondering what I would do. I felt a perverse sort of pleasure at his wariness. I had a reputation for being temperamental and erratic. I didn’t give a fuck about those pesky things called consequences.
    This was my fucking world; I just let them all exist in it.
    I should probably note that my drug use came with a hefty dose of narcissism.
    “Uh, Marco said you had some . . . you know . . . I just wanted to buy whatever you have,” the guy stammered. I didn’t know him. But he sure as hell knew me. They all did.
    I was a hard guy not to know.
    Feeling suddenly magnanimous, I pulled out the last of the pills and held them up in front of him. “That’ll be double for you ,” I told him pointedly, amused by the flash of anger on his ugly face. What the hell would he do about it? Fight me? Steal my drugs? I didn’t think so. He clearly didn’t have the balls for that.
    I smirked as he handed me eighty dollars and took the two pills in my hand. I folded up the money and put it in my pocket. “Nice doin’ business with you,” I said dryly, pushing past him and heading toward the bar.
    I was on top of the universe. Nothing could bring me down. I was the king of this fucking castle.
    And then I saw her.
    The flash of her blond hair in the strobing lights caught my attention immediately. My eyes honed in on the sight of her—a beacon in my own personal darkness.
    She was dressed differently than she had been the last time. Gone were the jeans and T-shirt. Tonight it was all about the short skirt and see-through top, a tantalizing glimpse of what lay beneath.
    But it didn’t look right. Tonight it was more like she was trying to be something it was so very obvious she wasn’t, though I admit that I appreciated the sight of her long legs underneath the short skirt.
    It was like seeing a gazelle among lions. She would be eaten alive here. But as I watched her dance, I could tell there was a part of her that wanted to be devoured.
    She danced like she wasn’t entirely comfortable in her body. There was a hesitancy to her movements that seemed at war with the look of abandon on her face.
    And it was a beautiful fucking face.
    She seemed to be alone. Just like last time. As though she were waiting for me to swoop in and take her away.
    “The usual?” the bartender, Eric, asked me. I barely nodded my head, not wanting to give anyone or anything else my attention.
    She swayed to the music, as though willing herself to relax and go with it. She seemed to be begging for me to help her let go.
    I smiled to myself, knowing I could help her get to that place she wanted to be.
    I could be her white rabbit. She just needed to follow me where I wanted to lead her.
    Maybe these thoughts weren’t rational. They were bordering on crazy. But they gave me an intoxicating sense of power.
    I wanted her.
    And I would have her.
    I always took what I wanted.
    But then she wasn’t alone