in?â I ask an older Asian guy in front of me.
All he does is nod a little. His eyes are wide and he looks like heâs in shock, like he might pass out at any moment. He turns away from me. Others in the line arelouder. Some cry. A few just keep talking about how theyâre going to kill every alien they see as soon as they find a gun. I keep quiet, wishing Iâd brought one of the phones with me or that I had my headphones. Even the broken ones, which are back in an apartment I might never get to return to. Without music or some kind of distraction, Iâm left alone with my thoughts. I worry.
After what feels like hours, Iâm finally at the front of the line.
âCan I get your name?â a woman asks. Her hairâs tied back in a black bandanna and there are dark bags under her eyes. I wonder how long sheâs been at this.
âDaniela Morales,â I say. âLook, Iâm trying to find my mom.â
âWeâre just taking information here,â she says, looking up from her electronic tablet. âThere are systems being put into place at our secondary evac site to connect missing persons. The bus will take you there once I have your info.â
âBut I need to know if sheâs there,â I say. âIf sheâs not . . .â Iâm not sure what to say next. Iâll go back to Manhattan? Would they even let me back across the bridge? Doubtful, but I could find a way.
The womanâs eyebrows draw together and she purses her lips. She looks like sheâs tired of hearing this. Iâm guessing Iâm not the first person trying to find someone I love.
âIf youâll spell your full nameâ,â she starts.
âYouâre checking everyone in? My momâs name is Roxanne Morales. Sheâs a waitress downtown. Please, can you just look?â
She looks at me for a few seconds. I can feel my eyes stinging. Finally, she taps on the electronic screen a few times. After scrolling through some lists, she lets out a small sigh. She doesnât say anything, just looks up at me and shakes her head.
The stinging gets worse.
âMorales,â I say again. âM-O-R-A-L-E-S.â
âIâm sorry, Daniela, but thereâs no Roxanne Morales in my database. Now, weâre only getting updates from the other sites every hour or so. Maybe she went to one of the other evacuation points farther uptown.â
I shake my head. My fingers grip the edge of the table in front of me. I donât want to leave. I canât walk away.
âNo, she worked in the Financial District.â
The womanâs eye twitches a little.
âWhere, exactly?â she asks. âWhere does she work?â
I tell her the location, just off Wall Street, not taking my eyes off hers. Iâm so focused that I donât even notice sheâs moving her hand until itâs on top of mine.
âThat area was hit really hard in the initial attack, Daniela,â she says quietly but firmly. âWe havenât seen many survivors from that location. Thereâs always hope, but our rescue teams are still having troublenavigating much of downtown. The best thing for you to do is to give me the rest of your info and go to the secondary site. That way if your mom comes through here, sheâllââ
I run. I donât know where Iâm going, I just go. The woman shouts my name but doesnât follow. I pass a makeshift emergency room, doctors, injured bystanders, firemen, policemen who look like they havenât slept in days. National Guardsmen and -women eye me as I pass by, but no one stops me. I keep going, until I finally find myself down by the water, staring at the smoke rising from lower Manhattan.
We havenât seen many survivors from that location.
She told me to go home. There was an explosionâof course it was an explosion, no matter how much I try to tell myself that it wasnâtâand then silence. We