miles from the shoreline, she had a view all the way across the water. And as she’d done at the end of every flight since Thomas had died, she looked beyond the lake, across to where Birch Bay was nestled snugly among the pines and birches . . . and felt even more alone than she was.
Entering the house through the back door, she pulled out her cell and checked for messages. There were three. She didn’t advertise regular business hours and rarely bothered answering her phone when working.
“Hello,” a male voice said after she hit the button to play the messages. “I was told that you don’t have a problem taking people to the top of Mount Cleveland.”
Nope. She didn’t have a problem doing anything.
“If that’s the case. My girlfriend and I”—the owner of the voice cleared his throat and then lowered his voice—“I want to propose to my girlfriend. She loves to hike Glacier, so I want to take her to the top.”
Harper’s heart squeezed. Proposals were both her favorite and the most bittersweet.
The caller left his number, and Harper listened to the remaining two messages, both of them inquiring about chartering a personalized tour of the area. She wrote down all the numbers and decided to fix herself a late lunch. She’d taken a snack with her when she’d headed out to pick up her passengers that morning but hadn’t been in the mood to eat when lunchtime had rolled around. How could she eat when her insides were in turmoil?
But the funny thing was, the turmoil hadn’t shown up in the form she’d expected.
Immediately after sleeping with Nick, she’d been overwhelmed by what she’d done. She’d expected that. It was her first and only time with another man, after all. But she’d also been bowled over by how much she’d enjoyed it. And she had not expected that. Not because she’d doubted Nick’s skill, but for the pure fact that he wasn’t Thomas. It had never once crossed her mind that another man’s touch could make her feel anything similar to Thomas’s.
Therefore, she’d kicked Nick out. And had felt a little bad about it ever since.
She smiled at the memory as she stood at the sink and rinsed off lettuce and spinach to go on a sandwich. She’d caught him off guard again. That time, not in a good way. She’d instigated the entire thing, had been a full participant, and she’d gotten way more than she’d ever hoped for. Yet the minute it had been over, the thought of touching him—of snuggling up to him—had terrified her.
Her sending him away had hurt his feelings, she knew. Though he’d assured her that leaving was perfectly fine. He slept better alone, after all.
But she hadn’t bought it. It had bothered him how she’d changed course so quickly. And the truth was, it bothered her, too. But she’d needed to be alone in that moment. It had all been too much. He’d made her feel and need and want so much. Way more than one night in bed with him could ever provide. But the worst part had been that she’d wantedto curl into him in the aftermath. Just let him hold her. Only, if he’d held her . . .
She blew out a harsh breath. If Nick had held her after showing such tenderness and concern before he’d even touched her, she feared she would’ve fallen apart.
Ditching the idea of food, she moved to the living room and turned on the TV. There was little she ever watched with interest—mostly it was about having noise in the house—so she dropped to the couch and started flipping through channels. She stopped when she got to a commercial that caught her attention. It was the one featuring Nick.
She sat up straighter as his face filled the seventy-inch screen. He was wearing that smile he was so good at. Then the camera panned back, and she trailed down over the rest of him. His thumbs were tucked securely behind a championship belt buckle, dark-washed jeans hugged every inch of his lower body, and his cowboy hat was pushed slightly off his forehead. Not the
Jan (ILT) J. C.; Gerardi Greenburg