Mr. West by Sarah Blake Page B

hurt.
    2
    The airbag had not deployed and his head had smashed against the steering wheel.
    His mother got on a plane.
    there is first the very uprightness of the face, its upright exposure, without defense
    He was swollen.
    He was indistinguishable.
    this gaze is precisely the epiphany of the face as a face
    His mother wrote how she controlled her expressions,
how she told his girlfriend how to behave.
    the epiphany of the face is ethical
    Women are familiar with how not to scare
someone who’s in danger.
    3
    The plastic surgeon was a bit of eye candy
his mother wrote.
    the face … formulates the first word
    It might be love, or attraction, or
humanity.
    4
    Kanye, you must have a relationship with your reflection I can’t understand.
    To structure, to surgery, to form.
    in the access to the face there is certainly also an access to the idea of God
    How did they put you together again?
How did you feel when someone saw you who didn’t know
    you had ever looked like someone other
than yourself?
    in the access to the face there is certainly also an access to the idea of God
    The metal plate in your chin follows the bone.
The metal plate in your chin might ache.
    5
    Regardless of his face, Kanye is not always treated like a man.

THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME I’VE WONDERED
    My favorite part of Donda West’s Raising Kanye is from the chapter “Through the Wire: The Accident,” when she sits at Kanye’s bedside contemplating the attractiveness of the doctor, saying even that Billy Dee and Denzel Washington could not compare.
    I want to spend my poem smiling.
    Billy Dee, Donda? Lando Calrissian of Star Wars ? Yes!
    But all I can think is, where is your father, Kanye?
    Where is he?
Where is he?
Where is he?

IN SONG
    After the accident, Kanye West wrote, produced, and recorded a song.
    â€œThrough the Wire.”
    As the title suggests, Kanye rapped every word through his wired-shut jaw.
    The first verse says:
    Â Â       
        
     
           
    Recently, Kanye compared himself to Emmett Till again.
    On one website they explain: “discussing the VMA incident … he compared the backlash he faced to the murder of Emmett Till, the Chicago teenager who was killed for whistling at a white woman in Money, Mississippi.”
    People have been outraged, but Kanye must
    feel a connection to this boy. And because of Kanye,
    Emmett’s story is on the internet again and again. 65 years later.
    Kanye knows what appropriation is.

SO KANYE TRANSFORMED HIMSELF, PRODUCER TO SUPERSTAR
    What do I know about being saved?
    In one video game I watch Noah play,
he points his gun at his friend and shoots him to heal him.
    My grandfather died despite treatment.
My mother’s treatment did everything it should.
    And I’ve never been in danger. I’ve hardly ever
been on high balconies or rooftops.
    But Kanye’s been at risk. In an interview, he was asked,
    â€œGiven that you had a near-death experience as you recount on ‘Through the Wire,’ what are your beliefs on death? Reincarnation?”
    He answered, “I feel like I’m here for a reason.”
    Why, Kanye? What’s the reason?
    Kanye said, “I don’t believe in reincarnation. Sometimes I wonder if I believe in heaven. I know I believe in Jesus.”
    I know you believe angels are with you.
This was not your first car accident.
    My grandfather was never in car accidents
though he was legally blind in one eye.
    An instance of saving I failed to notice?
    My grandfather believed. He looked at the stars as proof
long after he stopped going to synagogue.
    Kanye understood his belief—“I think 50% because it was instilled in me.
That’s what we call on.”
    50% because you were saved?
What is it about being saved?
    The best I know about saving is from childhood.
Jesus resurrected. Moses parting the sea. A Holocaust