Painless by S. A. Harazin Page B

scream. I say, “Yes, they are,” and she says, “No, they aren’t,” and then I say, “I’ll look for them.” Things have been getting lost after being put somewhere and then forgotten. Car keys, house keys, a car title, a sticker for a new car tag, Nana’s wallet, her mind.
    Nana points at Luna. “That woman is a thief and a whore. All she wants is your money.”
    Luna heads out of the room.
    There’s no point in arguing with Nana. She’ll only get sweaty and short of breath, and she doesn’t know what she’s saying. I pick up a garbage bag of stuff and get out of there. I’m pretty sure her glasses are in the bag.
    In the kitchen, I open the bag of garbage and dump everything onto the floor. Luna and I sort through it. It’s weird. It’s like Luna knew exactly what I intended to do with the bag.
    “Nana didn’t mean what she said,” I say.
    “I know. I was agitating her. That’s why I left.”
    The bag contains mostly underwear and pajamas.
    Then I pull out a graduation cap and a gown. Both are dark blue. “Look,” I say to Luna. “I think this was my dad’s.” I’m not throwing away his cap and gown. It’s bad luck.
    “Uh-huh,” she says and holds up the glasses.
    I take the rest of the throwaway clothes to the garage. I’m thinking that when people start getting rid of stuff, they’re getting ready to die.
    I walk back into the kitchen. “You need to get out of here for a while,” Luna says. “You’re losing it. Want to go for ice cream?”
    I know I’m losing my mind.
    “It gets to me too,” Luna says.
    “She’s better when her medicine kicks in,” I say. “But it doesn’t last.”
    Luna’s driving her old Toyota, even though the Lexis has been repaired. The rain’s stopped, and I’m keeping time to a song on the radio.
    She drives around the square in Waterly.
    “Know a good place?”
    “No,” I say.
    “Look,” Luna says. “The rainbow ends at Burger Barn. We have to go there. It’s spectacular, right?”
    “Yes.” If I’m looking for rainbows, I could find one in my yard after it rains.
    She gets a banana split, so I do the same. I’ve only had regular ice cream in flavors and not with bananas or chocolate or nuts.
    While we’re eating, I’m thinking this would be a good time for a conversation, but I don’t know what to say.
    I love your eyes and your hair and the way you smell? I know this from some TV movies I’ve seen.
    Luna takes a bite of her banana split and then wipes her chin. “I understand why Joe wants you somewhere else,” she says. “It’s not about you being helpless. It’s about you getting a break from your grandmother.”
    “It’s about him getting me out of the way,” I say.
    “I have another job,” Luna says.
    “You’re quitting?”
    She nods. “It’s full time.”
    “Where?”
    “The information desk at the Holly Building.”
    That’s where Dr. Goodman has his office and the tallest structure in town. At night when I’ve gone there, the lights from the building shine over the entire town.
    “It’s a great job with benefits.” Luna takes a bite of ice cream. “You’ll be fine, and I’m still going to come over. It’s just that I need more money, and I don’t like it when people assume I’m using you.”
    “I know you’re not,” I say, mixing up the chocolate with the ice cream. “You’re not happy being my personal assistant?”
    “Not anymore, but I’m going to miss you.”
    A while later we get back into the car, and she looks around, maybe for the rainbow. I’m not seeing one.

Chapter 13
    The housekeeper cooks and cleans, the sitter sits, and I bring Nana’s meals and snacks to her. I don’t tell anybody that Luna’s quit, and nobody notices. Nana’s been dwindling. She’s lost weight. She barely eats. Sometimes in the middle of the night, I’ll go to her room to watch and make sure she’s breathing.
    I’ve been working on proving I can be independent, not getting into trouble and staying