Save Me (Rock Romance #4) by A. L. Wood Page A

eyes.
    “Why ma’am are you finding humor in my attire?” I say while placing my hand on my chest and gasping, pretending to be offended.
    She laughs a beautiful melody, “why sir this is the first time I’ve seen you in something other than a rugged shirt and ripped jeans.” She mocks me.
    “You’ve seen me but a few times.” I point out that fact.
    “Just because I’ve only seen you in person but a few times doesn’t mean I haven’t seen you on television, in magazines, all that stuff.”
    “So you’ve followed the band then? Are you a fan Abagail? Please tell.” I ask my lips twisted into a grin.
    She blushes a light hue of pink. “Just a little. I love music, of course, I’ve heard of Steele’s Army , you guys are all over tabloids all the time. How could someone not know of you guys?” She brushes it off nonchalantly. 
    Which is the same reason she gives herself away to myself. There’s nothing more apparent than when someone tries brushing a question away, deflecting. She’s nervous and embarrassed, I bet she’s been a hardcore fan for a while.
    Another cause for me to be weary of getting involved in anything with her. Friendship, consensual prearranged sex, professional wise. She could want to do things that wouldn’t be about the band, but instead be about her interests, what she wants us to do. Fulfill some long loved dream, well if that’s what she has in mind I will be testing her tomorrow.
    I can’t go into a friendship with her not knowing that at least, there will never be a relationship. I can’t afford it emotionally, I have people that depend on me and if I break I’ll be of no good to them.
    “I’ll let you slide on that question, but make no mistake I will find you out.” I give her warning.
    “There’s nothing to find out. Are we going to eat or not? I’ll go without you.” She threatens.
     
    Dinner was nice if anything, slightly uncomfortable in the way that the two of us just had amazingly intense intercourse, something that I wanted to do again, then we shared a table while eating food after having a short conversation where she blew my idea off about friends with benefits. Just slightly awkward.
    I caught myself staring at her while eating, the way her lips would enclose the spoon or the straw in her glass, made my cock rigid. Wanting it to be my cock that she was closing her lips over, running her tongue over the head of me. Swallowing what I gave her.
    Instead , I end up coughing, spitting my drink down myself and spraying a little on her. She laughs, not the least bit bothered that the soda went flying in her face. After dinner, I invited her to join me on the beach, a solace to most of us in the band. She refused, saying she had work to do, which leads me to where I am now.
    Commiserating in the sand. Overlooking the horizon and the water crashing my chins. Attraction can be a mind fuck of a thing, it can make you want things you’ve never dared to want. Need infests itself within you, even knowing that you don’t deserve to have. I could walk out of whatever this thing is that she and I have going, she can deny it, she can deny me, but it’s all the same, it exists. That cannot be changed if it were changeable it would have happened months ago. After she left, I wouldn’t have thought of her. I wouldn’t have thought on the words I spoke to her, I wouldn’t still be attracted nor would she be to me.
    I sure as fuck wouldn’t be here, allowing cold as ice water to numb my feet. I would be in that hotel room, taking her, demanding her tell me who she is, what she wants, without a care. I wouldn’t be thinking of a way to approach this, a way to find out all of those answers without causing her harm. And I sure as fuck wouldn’t be thinking about her, about Sam . I wouldn’t be pissed at her all over again, it’s her fault I have this doubt in people. She’s at fault for my not trusting, for not wanting more, for my anger. She’s at fault for me