Snowbound by Janice Kay Johnson Page A

coming backtraumatized. Whatever happened must have been awful, to change you like this.
    Words had stuck in his throat, even with his favorite sister.
    Shed given him a swift hug. We love you, John. Im so glad youre safely home.
    He had feared being called up again, knowing he couldnt endure it, but in the end his emotional state was moot; hed never be physically able to serve again. He was glad, but felt guilty, too, because he had friends who would be going back. That was his idea of hell: another tour in Iraq.
    Before Fiona could ask more questions, the swinging door opened and Hopper came in.
    Hey, that smells really good. Whens dinner?
    Gosh, it might be quicker if we had help, his teacher said with clear mischief. The garlic bread needs slicing, doesnt it, John?
    No fair! You already said we have to clean the kitchen!
    She laughed at him. Just trying to scare you. John, when will dinner be ready?
    An hour.
    The boy came over to the stove, dipped a finger in the sauce and tasted, dancing out of the kitchen just ahead of the towel Fiona snapped at him.
    Glass of wine? John asked.
    She looked wistful, but said, I shouldnt. Im still on the job. Sort of. I dont want the kids going back and telling anyone I drank when I was in charge.
    He nodded, unsurprised when she said, Speaking of which, let me go count noses. Again.
    Telling himself he didnt mind some time alone, he went to the freezer and took out bags of the red, high-bush huckleberries hed picked and frozen that summer. By the time he got back, shed returned and was getting a pitcher of cranberry juice from the refrigerator.
    All present and accounted for, she reported. Nobody seems to need me.
    I do.
    John was staggered by the fervency of his reaction. Instinctively he rejected it.
    No. If he needed anything at all, it was solitude. He was attracted to her, enjoying the novelty of having lighthearted conversation with a pretty woman. Need was gut level. It was the next breath, the next meal, the chance to sink into the oblivion of sleep.
    If he already hated the idea of watching her drive away with her vanful of kids, well, that was a good sign. It meant someday he might want to return to his former life. To live normally againwhatever that meant.
    He surfaced to realize that Fiona was watching him.
    Her voice was soft, her tone tentative. I could go back to my book if youd rather.
    If he were smart, hed say, Why dont you do that while I finish up here? Not being unfriendly, but making clear that he didnt need her, either.
    Stay. He sounded rusty again, as if he didnt know how to ask for what he wanted. He tried again. Talk to me. Tell me about What? Her life? What sheexpected the right man to be like? No. Hed scare her. He was scaring himself. A movie. I havent seen one in a long time. Whats the last one you went to?
    She relaxed, as hed hoped she would. While he measured sugar and flour and put together the cobbler, she told him about a thriller with a huge budget, big stars and an unlikely plot.
    At one point he glanced at the clock and thought in surprise, They havent even been here twenty-four hours.
    How, in such a short time, had he gotten to the point where he had thoughts like, I need her? He hadnt kissed her, hadnt touched her beyond a hand on her shoulder, didnt know that she felt anything at all for him. He suspected shed have been just as friendly to the codger whod owned the lodge before him.
    Although, she had spent the afternoon reading about the Iraq war.
    Maybe because of him, maybe not.
    Shed moved on to talking about other things, an exhibit at the Portland Art Museum, music she liked. John guessed he must have nodded or interjected a word here and there, because he didnt want her to quit.
    He didnt need her; that had been a ridiculous thought. But he wouldnt mind if snow kept falling for another day or two.
    And maybe if the state road crew left Thunder Mountain Lodge isolated for a while after that, hed eventually get his fill and want his