Texas Born by Judith Gould Page A

to her, afraid to be left alone with her nightmare.
    'I'll only be a moment,' Elender assured her
gently.
    Elizabeth-Anne looked at her doubtfully, but
obediently lay back down.
    Elender left, and soon returned with the
bottle of laudanum she kept on a shelf in the kitchen and poured a
mere drop in a teaspoon.
    Elizabeth-Anne licked the spoon dry and
grimaced, but for the rest of the night she slept peacefully. The
next day, for the first time, she awakened without a haunted,
restless look.
    The next night, without the laudanum, the
nightmares returned. Elender gave her another tiny dose, and
Elizabeth-Anne slept soundly.
    From that day on, before bedtime Elender
would give her a drop or two.
    She did not know that it was the beginning of
Elizabeth-Anne's addiction.

8
     
     
     
    Amanda stood uncomfortably beside Bazzel
Grubb in front of the big clapboard house. The ground-floor windows
were all lit, and from inside came the tinkling of a piano and
voices raised in a carol. They were mostly men's voices, deep and
off-key, but a woman's strong voice overpowered them and kept the
tune going:
     
    Deck the hall with boughs of holly,
    Fa la la la la, la la la la,
    'Tis the season to be jolly,
    Fa la la la la, la la la la . . .
     
    Amanda glanced sideways at Bazzel. 'I still
don't like this,' she murmured. Her lips were numb from the cold
and her nose was running. She wiped it on the sleeve of her coat.
'It ain't right, Bazzel. 'Specially not at Christmastime.'
    Bazzel stared at the house through the sheets
of rain. For the first time, he, too, felt misgivings. They had
begun at the railroad station. Night had fallen by the time they
had got off the train, and all the while they'd ridden here in the
horse-drawn buggy they'd hired, he'd been on the lookout for signs
of the circus. In the night he hadn't been able to see a thing, and
there wasn't even any moonlight because of the rain. He'd thought
it best not to ask the old man who drove the buggy anything about
the circus. These small towns were all alike. When one person as
much as sneezed, the next day everybody within miles knew about
it.
    Amanda sensed his misgivings. She took his
arm to turn him around and leave—not that they had anyplace else to
go.
    He looked at her coldly, his pale eyes
glittering like steel behind his wet, round wire-rimmed glasses.
'You're Elspeth,' he said quietly, 'and don't fergit it. That's all
that matters. Answer to that name only. Case anybody asks, when you
married me you became a Grubb. Elspeth Grubb.' He shivered
suddenly. 'It's cold out here. Let's git inside.'
    Amanda sighed deeply as he picked up his
suitcases, and she reluctantly picked hers up too. She followed
behind him, climbing the three steps up to the porch. The familiar
strains of the music inside stopped, but a moment later 'Hark! the
Herald Angels Sing' began.
    Bazzel knocked loudly on the door.
     
    Hark! the herald angels sing,
    Glory to the newborn king,
    Peace on earth . . .
     
    In the parlor, Elizabeth-Anne slid quietly
over to the far side of the settee and kept one sharp eye peeled on
Jenny's feet, since Jenny had been giving her painful little kicks
on the ankle with the tips of her boots. With her other eye she
watched the gentlemen standing around the spinet, which had been
moved from its usual spot in front of the windows. Elizabeth-Anne
knew that Auntie had moved it there especially for her—so that it
hid the fireplace completely. The gesture made her feel safe. Now,
if only Jenny would leave her alone, life would be almost
perfect.
    Elizabeth-Anne felt prettier than she ever
had. Auntie had bought two identical dresses—one for Jenny and one
for her. They were white, with eyelets down the front, and were the
prettiest dresses she had ever seen. And because it was Christmas
Eve, Auntie had parted their hair in the middle and tied it at the
sides with red and green silk ribbons.
    Abruptly Auntie stopped playing, her fingers
poised in midair. She cocked her head