The Ultimate Stonemage: A Modest Autobiography by Duncan McKenzie Page B

reason raised a suspicion where my intuition had shown none, for why should two monks have come to the harbour? Should they not be in the abbey, praying? Or in the market, buying goods or begging? It was very dubious, so I sent the myrmidons to seize the monks, and the men did not even bother to run—for doubtless they realized the futility of denying their guilt—and were brought back to me. After this, I returned, with my prisoners, to the cathedral.
    Now, when I recount this story, I am often asked whether the behaviour of these people might not have arisen purely out of a fear of wrongful arrest. Well, it is true I quickly became widely feared in Quebec—although I was respected too, for my former critics soon saw I was no caged bird, but a hard-working man of honour, and one to be reckoned with. However, it is not fear that identifies an enemy of the church, but another, less tangible property. Therefore, while many of the townspeople I encountered would indeed show great fear, and might quickly make themselves scarce, or hide their heads when I was near, this was no proof of guilt, just as a lack of fear was no proof of innocence. Rather, I looked for a certain, subtle difference between the behaviour of a guilty person and an innocent, which one may recognize with the passage of time, and which is impossible to describe, but equally impossible to mistake.
    And if you doubt the accuracy of my methods, hear what we discovered when we interrogated the prisoners upon the wire.
    The old fishmonger confessed he hated God and all His works, and had plotted to overthrow the church, and had conspired with others to kill thebishopa and myself and many other good and charitable people. Also he confessed to consorting with demons and goblins. Here he lied, for educated persons know that goblins are mythical, but he clung to his story despite my protests, and so, in lying he committed perjury, which is another very grave offence.
    The woman confessed she hated God and all His works, and had plotted to overthrow the church, and had seduced virtuous men, and virtuous women too, and had conspired to create war, and had placed noxious fluids from diseased animals into wells, and had, on many occasions, eaten human flesh.
    The boy confessed he hated God and all His works, and had plotted to overthrow the church, and had committed many sins so terrible he did not know the names for them and was incapable of describing them with a mortal tongue. Also he confessed to the sin of stupidity, and to the sin of sloth.
    The first monk confessed he hated God and all His works, and had plotted to overthrow the church, and had plotted to burn the abbey and the cathedral, and then to set ablaze the whole town, intending to dance naked amidst the flames, while eating human flesh. I interrogated him no further, for it was clear he was not only dangerous but also completely insane.
    The second monk was very stubborn and initially confessed only to desiring bony old women. This, I knew, was a vicious insult directed at me and my love of the bishopa, yet I did not let my anger affect my duties as interrogator. Therefore I proceeded slowly and patiently, returning to him every day, until at last, after ten days upon the wire, he confessed he hated many of God’s works, and planned, if he escaped, to overthrow the church and to kill certain archbishops. This was all I needed to hear, and you may rest assured the fellow did not survive to achieve his fearsome ambition.
    Now, these five were merely my prisoners from one afternoon of searching. During the following months, I would go into the town every day or two. I always returned with prisoners, and, upon interrogation, there was not one of these who had been falsely arrested. Indeed, so proficient was I at seeking out the enemies of the church that I became popularly known as the Bloody Archbishop, andYreth the Bloody, because those who watched my infallible instinct at work thought it was Christ’s