The World According to Humphrey by Betty G. Birney Page B

person, especially when she’s with Aldo.
    All the Rinaldis made a big fuss over Maria and praised the bread and cookies she’d brought from the bakery where she worked.
    After all the commotion of their arrival died down, I heard Aldo tell Maria, “Now there’s someone really important I want you to meet.”
    And he introduced her to ME-ME-ME!
    “Believe it or not, Humphrey is one of my best friends,” he told her. “And he was the very first friend I told about you.”
    “Then I am honored to meet you, Humphrey,” Maria said, smiling down at me.
    “The pleasure is all mine!” I squeaked.
    “See? He likes you,” said Aldo.
    And indeed, I did.

    The world seemed like a pretty nice place for a handsome young hamster like me, I can tell you. I was sitting on top of the world when I returned to Room 26 on Monday. But I just about toppled off when Mrs. Brisbane made an alarming announcement.
    “Class, as you know, this will be a short week, due to Thanksgiving,” she said. “And that means Humphrey will need a home for four days instead of two. Now, who wants to volunteer?”
    You won’t believe what I’m going to say. NOT ONE HAND WENT UP. I actually fell off my wheel.
    Mrs. Brisbane was surprised, too. “No one?” she asked. “Heidi, didn’t you want to take Humphrey home?”
    “Oh, yes. But we’re going to my grandma’s house for Thanksgiving,” she explained.
    “Art, didn’t you ask for Humphrey last week?” Mrs. Brisbane asked.
    “Yes, but we’re having all my relatives for Thanksgiving and Mom says it wouldn’t be a good time,” Art explained.
    And so it went. Every single classmate had big plans for Thanksgiving. Plans that didn’t include having an extra hamster around.
    I was WORRIED-WORRIED-WORRIED. I didn’t want to spend four days alone in Room 26.
    I worried all day Monday. I worried all day Tuesday. I worried even more all day Wednesday.
    At the end of the day, Principal Morales stopped by to give Mrs. Brisbane an envelope. I think it was her pay-check, because she was especially glad to see him.
    “I have a huge favor to ask,” she said.
    “Sure, Sue. What is it?” asked Principal Morales. He wore a tie with little turkeys all over it.
    “Could you possibly take Humphrey for the weekend?”
    I had my paws crossed that he’d say yes. But Principal Morales didn’t even smile.
    “Oh, Sue, I’d love to, but we’re going out of town for the holiday,” he told her. “Another time, I’d love to.”
    Another time wouldn’t matter. I needed a place to go now.
    After the principal left, Mrs. Brisbane sighed and began gathering up her papers.
    Then she turned to me.
    “Well, Humphrey, it looks like you’re going home with me for Thanksgiving,” she said grimly.
    My fate was sealed. I was going to the home of the woman who had once vowed to get rid of me—for four whole days! And frankly, I was worried I’d never come back!
    TIP TWELVE: If you must leave your hamster with a caretaker, make sure that it is someone you know and trust.
     
    Guide to the Care and Feeding of Hamsters, Dr. Harvey H. Hammer

13
    Thanks but No Thanks
    S ince Mrs. Brisbane didn’t say a word to me on the drive home, I had time to reflect on the last few months. I had not had a bad experience with any of the families I had visited. In fact, they had all been gracious and welcoming (except Miranda’s dog, Clem, but I knew how to handle him). In return, I’d lent them a helping paw here and there. After all, you can learn a lot about yourself by getting to know another species.
    I was overdue for trouble. And I was likely to get it at Brisbane’s House of Horrors. That’s how I pictured her home: decorated with skeletons and bats and eerie jack-o’-lanterns all year long. I was shivering at the picture I had in mind when Mrs. Brisbane actually spoke.
    “Humphrey, I need you like I need a hole in the head,” she complained.
    “THE SAME TO YOU!” I squeaked back rudely, knowing she wouldn’t