Here. Here is the note I found. I won’t lie to you. I’ll tell you everything from this day forward.”
Donny was shocked she let them read his last letter. She must’ve been made of freaking steel to stand and do that. He continued to stare uselessly at his feet. Vickie appeared in the living room entrance before coming over to sit by him. She took his hand and he squeezed hers. She was uncharacteristically quiet.
Then… tears. So much crying and confusion, he didn’t know what to do. Vickie got up and tried to comfort the girls too, but there was no solace for either one. Who could have blamed them? Just like Tracy was last night. Yet, to her children, she was totally pulled together and calm and soothing, speaking to them in a voice that didn’t rise. She stroked their hair and shoulders as she hugged and kissed their heads. She let them protest and scream with her, at her, at life, and mostly at their father.
Donny was in awe.
He shifted in the chair and didn’t know what to do. He was the only man in the room and really didn’t want to be there. The crying girls, sobbing sisters, made him think of about a thousand other places he would have preferred to be. But thanks to Micah fucking McKinley, he had a feeling this was right where he’d find himself for the near future. Julia crawled around the living room, oblivious to the grief her cousins were enduring. He leaned down and picked her up, hugging her to him, smelling the soft scent of strawberry from the shampoo Tracy used on her. His heart clenched. How could a father ever leave his daughters like that? It was completely unimaginable. Not to mention, tragic, and it made his own insides ache to think about losing Julia.
Julia smiled up at him and grabbed his cheek when he twisted her around so he could stare into her little, round, porcelain-white face.
He didn’t know. He had no idea when Vickie got pregnant that Julia would be the end result. It was all so abstract. Something miraculous was happening, yes, but not this, not what he felt now. His heart felt like it beat outside his chest in the form of this little creature. She was born and everything, without any exceptions, that came before her, and everyone who came before her, lost all importance in his life. He loved Julia in a way he loved no one else. Not his parents. Or his brother. Or Vickie.
And now, Micah had just thrown everything away. Like trash. He treated his daughters and Tracy like disposable items he could leave on the curb. And for what? Fear? His fear of going to prison? Prison would have been easier to endure for Donny than the idea of separating from his daughter for good. Or causing so much pain to them. Julia squirmed when he almost convulsively hugged her closer to his chest. He could not fathom losing her. Death. That would be about the only way she could not be in his life.
The money, the crimes, and the shocking betrayal were nothing compared to Micah deserting his children. Only an amoral monster without any conscience could be willing do that.
Even Vickie wouldn’t opt to leave Julia forever.
A warm rush of feelings filled his heart as he glanced at his wife. She was there. Not half-assed there, but completely there. She held Tracy last night. She soothed and talked to her, sleeping next to her and comforting her. She was now holding Ally in her arms as all four of them huddled together, crying.
His heart swelled even more. Look at her. She was doing it. She was trying to comfort the little girls just like a mother would. Hope started to flicker in his chest. Maybe. Maybe there was still something between them. Maybe she really could become a decent mother to his daughter. Maybe even a decent wife to him.
They rushed into their marriage. Obviously. It hadn’t worked, but the thing was: there they were. They were married and had created this perfect, tiny, little person who needed both of them. Julia was a very compelling, albeit, fulfilling, reason to make it