Through to You by Lauren Barnholdt Page A

think, Harper?”
    â€œFor what?” I ask.
    We’re sitting outside at McDonald’s during our lunch period. Juniors and seniors are allowed to leave during lunch, as long as we stay on the main street near school. How they think they’re going to enforce this, I have no idea, since it’s not like they can follow every one of us and try to figure out where it is we’re spending our lunch period.
    â€œFor my Juilliard application!” She throws her hands up and looks over at Nico, who’s sitting next to me. “Is she spacey lately, or what?”
    â€œShe’s definitely spacey lately,” Nico says, nodding. It figures he would take her side. This is why I hate when the three of us hang out. “What’s going on, Harper?”
    â€œNothing!” I say.
    â€œI think it has to do with Penn,” Anna says. She leans over and studies me, then rests her chin on her hands. The long sleeves of her gauzy black shirt almost skim the pile of ketchup she’s set up near her fries.
    â€œIt is not about Penn!”
    â€œIt’s definitely about Penn,” Nico says, like he knows something about it.
    â€œDef,” Anna agrees. Then they start to do this thing they do sometimes that really annoys me. They talk about me like I’m not there. I know Anna does it because it makes her feel closer to Nico, and I know she doesn’t mean anything by it. But still. It’s irritating as hell.
    â€œI think they had sex,” Nico says.
    â€œNo way,” Anna says. She picks up a fry and twirls it around in the air, like she’s contemplating. “Harper wouldn’t have had sex with him. She’d make him wait. But they might have kissed.”
    â€œI don’t know,” Nico says. “Harper might have been too smart for that.”
    â€œToo smart?” Anna asks.
    â€œYeah,” Nico replies, then takes a sip of his soda. “She knows Penn is the kiss-’em-and-leave-’em type. So she might have slept with him just to make sure she got what she could, while she could.”
    â€œPenn’s not like that,” I say before I can stop myself. I can’t help it. I don’t like them saying bad things about him, even though they’re obviously true. Penn must be the kiss-’em-and-leave-’em type. I mean, look what he’s doing to me.
    â€œOooh, I think she’s sticking up for him,” Anna teases.
    â€œShe is,” Nico says. “She’s sticking up for him even though he’s a total douche.”
    â€œHe’s not a douche,” I say.
    â€œHe is,” Nico says. “He used to be a total douche when he was on the baseball team, walking around like he was this big man on campus, and then as soon as he got hurt, he dropped all his friends and became angry.” He rolls his eyes. “What a baby.”
    â€œI don’t know. I think it’s kind of sexy the way he’s always walking around scowling,” Anna says. She glances at me out of the corner of her eye. “And I think Harper does too.”
    She’s right. I do like the way Penn is always scowling. Every once in a while, though, I’ll catch him smiling, and it makes my heart skip. Not that I look at him all that much. Only when I know I can get away with it, which isn’t that often, since he sits behind me in the one class we have together. Which is another added pressure. I’m always worried that he’s looking at me in class, so I make sure that I’m sitting upstraight, and that my hair is falling perfectly down my back. Which I know is ridiculous, because there’s no way he’s even looking at me. And the reason I know this is because anytime I’ve been looking at him , he’s not looking at me. Not even once.
    â€œOooh, she’s getting red,” Anna says, elbowing Nico.
    But he’s already bored of the conversation, and he’s texting on his