A Free Heart by Amelia C. Adams

but you’d never be able to walk down a street together or attend a party together. It could never be, not for your whole lives.”
    “But I don’t care about parties,” Harriet protested. “I used to, but not anymore. They aren’t important. Love is what’s important.”
    “And it’s good that you know that. But you’d get mighty tired hiding inside your house all the time. It would put a strain on you and on your marriage. Trust me, being someone’s wife is challenging enough without bringing all the rest of it along for the ride.”
    “So you were against our marriage, then?” Harriet’s heart felt like it was filled with wet sand.
    “If we lived in a perfect world where a white man and a black man could stand beside each other and never have a moment’s thought as to who was better, I would have loved to see you married. But we don’t live in that world, baby girl. We live in a world of hate and fear, where people are bought and sold like flour or eggs. Even though the war is over now and the slaves are free, men and women aren’t free from the thoughts and ideas that started the war in the first place. The color of my skin isn’t going to change just because I’m free now, and people’s minds aren’t going to change just because the North won.”
    Jane reached out and touched Harriet’s hand. “I never objected to him marrying you. I objected to the way you’d be treated. Where would you find a place to marry and live in peace? Where would you find a place to raise your children without taunting and ridicule? I’d want you to be truly happy, and I was afraid that would never be. And look what happened—Sam lost his life just because he had the courage to propose. What would they have done to him if he’d succeeded in taking you out of Georgia? You can only kill a man so dead.”
    “Do you blame me, Jane? Do you blame me because Sam died?” Harriet’s voice caught in her throat. If her chest hurt any more than it already did, she might think she needed to send for a doctor.
    “No, baby girl. Sam made his choice, and he was happy with it. Some wicked men decided to stop him, but I know for a fact that he died loving you, not regretting anything. That’s just the man my boy was.” Jane nodded as though that settled it. “And I’ll always be grateful to your brother, Mr. Sterling, for the letter he wrote, telling me what happened. It was an awful task, but he did it kindly. He’s a good man.”
    “I never asked if anyone in my family knew where you were,” Harriet said, feeling foolish.
    “Likely they wouldn’t have told you. Kin protects kin, and they might have wanted to spare you more pain. But you’re here now, and that’s all that matters.”
    Harriet laid her cheek on the table and cried. Jane placed her hand on Harriet’s forehead and smoothed back the little strands and tendrils that had come loose. “That’s right. You cry it out. You cry until you can’t anymore. One thing I know is that crying won’t bring Sam back, but it will make the hurt less. Sometimes that’s the best we can do.”
     
     

Chapter Ten
     
    As Tom guided the buggy away from the Robinsons’ house, he kept glancing over at Harriet. Her face looked pale, and she was missing her usual spark. He wondered if she would tell him what had happened while he was out wandering the property with Mr. Robinson. He knew she’d cried—her eyes still bore evidence of it. But was it the kind of crying that healed, or the kind that made the pain worse?
    He was able to secure two rooms at a hotel near the livery stable, and carried Harriet’s bag up the stairs for her. “Are you hungry? I noticed they have a restaurant downstairs.”
    “I’m actually not hungry at all, Tom, but don’t let that stop you. I’m going to lock my door and go to bed early.”
    He studied her eyes for a moment. They weren’t quite as red as they’d been when they first left the Robinsons’, but they threatened to cloud over