A Third of Me by Alan Conway Page A

part, more mature.
    He is deeper .
    Brian paints a beautiful image of our future together and what it will be like. Each detail delicately creates a monumental masterpiece in my mind’s eye where tears are about to come, but I hold them back.
    “So what do you think?” he asks.
    “I don't know what to say.”
    “I’d normally say you don’t have to say anything , but in this case, you need to say something.”
    I’m thinking very, very hard about this. This is beyond huge. It’s insane, really. Only a reckless fool would go for it.
    I put my hand on Brian’s. He’s looking away to avoid the rejection he’s expecting.
    “I’ll do it for you.”
    “Don't do it for me,” he says. “Do it for the three of us. Do it for yourself. We’ll all be in this together.”
    “When are you going to tell him?”
    “Soon.” He smiles and pays for our meal.
    “ What are you going to tell him?” I ask while he’s helping me with my coat. As Brian holds open the door for me, I notice his eyes are smiling – they do that. When he leans over I feel his nose tickle my ear, giving me a wild rush of goosebumps.
    “That we’re going to be a family.”
     
    Damon
    I like babies. I never did see myself as a father, but that doesn’t mean I never wanted to be. I always told myself if it ever happened accidentally, I’d get my act together and be a responsible parent.
    But now that I'm with Brian and things are good – we're not openly a couple nor do I really consider us as one because it’s all still kind of weird to me – but I can’t help wondering if I would have been a good father. If somewhere down the road Brian and I don’t work out, maybe the opportunity will come, I suppose.
    But for now I’m happy. And hell, maybe we are a couple. Regardless, I’m not ready for what Brian is about to tell me.
    This is a typical night. We’re in our room – the room that use to be mine is now an office we both share – and Brian is propped up against the headboard pounding away at the keys on his laptop – working out a new story, I think, but he’s being an ass and won’t let me read anything until he’s done – and I’m down at the edge of the bed with my legs crossed, controller in hand, trying for one more achievement on this map before I have to return the game tomorrow.
    Brian is usually asleep by now. I stay up late and play until one or two o’clock because I don't have to be at work until nine.
    I hear his laptop close and pages rustling behind me. The magazine appears beside my knee, rolled open to an article circled in blue ink.
    I pause the game then decide to just shut it down for the night. I lie back and read the title out loud: “ Child Born of Three Parents: Controversy Erupts. What's this?”
    “Just read it,” Brian says.
    I read it slowly to myself. I haven’t made the connection yet.
    Brian crawls over beside me and says, “I tracked down that doctor, Dr. David Carter out of Austin, Texas, and emailed him with questions.”
    “For the story you're working on?”
    “No, silly.” Then it clicks.
    “Wait a minute, are you suggesting–”
    “Just hear me out, okay? I know you want kids of your own. And I’ve seen you with kids and you're wonderful with them.”
    “But you hate kids,” I say but meaning well.
    “I don’t hate kids. I just don’t have much experience with babies. I think this would be a great option for us to consider since we’ve been together almost two years now and–”
    “What about adoption? Wouldn’t that be cheaper and more…I dunno…ethical?”
    “Damon, we can have a child of our own. Read it again. It will be our flesh and blood. And Lauren’s, too.”
    “ Lauren?! Have you even talked to her about this? There’s no way–”
    “There is a way,” Brian says, resting his warm hand on my shoulder. “And of course I’ve discussed it with her. She’s totally onboard with this.”
    “Are you fuckin serious right now? Holy crap, dude, I can’t