Adams Grove 03-Wedding Cake and Big Mistakes by Nancy Naigle

me?
    Ben patted his hand across his heart. “I’m glad it found you. Your mom would be so happy to know you are wearing it.”
    What about you?
    There was a gentle softness in Ben’s voice. “I’m happy to know you have it. It’s supposed to bring great luck and long-lasting love. Not that your mom and I ever needed any help in that area.”
    “I know,” Carolanne said quietly. “I know how much you loved her.”
    He reached for her hand. “And you.”
    She drew her lips tight, as tight as her heart felt right that second. She glanced toward Connor, wishing he’d disappear.
    “And, Carolanne, I let you down. I know I did, but I never stopped loving you. You were the best thing your mother and I ever did together.”
    “Don’t…” Are you reading my mind? Not now, Dad. If you’re reading my mind, read this, too. Please, not now. I can’t talk about this right now.
    “It’s important to me that you know that I know I let you down. I take accountability for that. I can’t fix the past. God knows I wish I could.” His voice shook as he spoke.
    She bit the inside of her cheek and stared past him, trying not to break down herself. Connor staring wasn’t making it any better.
    “Carolanne, I love you, and I’m sorry…for everything. I’m not asking you to forget the past, but if we could just…”
    She tried to hide her misery, but his words sliced the past like a new wound. We’re both broken. “Dad, let’s put it behind us, OK?”
    “Yeah,” Ben said, then shrugged. “OK.”
    She stepped back, needing the space. It was long overdue, but now what? How do you end a moment like this? She had morequestions, but what if that made things worse? This was progress. Let it be, Carolanne. “I’ve got to run and get changed for the rehearsal dinner,” she said. “I’ll leave you guys to play with your guns. I’ll see you later, Connor.”
    They were still standing in the hall when she walked out the door and ran upstairs.
    As soon as she got to her apartment, she turned the dead bolt and ran to her bedroom. She lay across the bed, crying and wondering how she was going to push past so many years of built-up anger and hurt without it suffocating her in the process. As much as she knew she should put it behind her, the little girl inside her still hurt.
    Connor, how could you have put me in that position? I wasn’t ready.

Chapter Nine
    Three cold washcloths and a double dose of eyedrops later, Carolanne arrived at the church for the rehearsal dinner. She walked from her car up the long walkway. As a little girl, she used to think the doors to this church were gigantic. Nothing big about them now—must have just been the feeling of something bigger inside.
    She’d prayed for many things here over the years. She’d prayed so hard for Mom to be well and for everything to be OK, but it hadn’t been enough. That hadn’t shaken her faith, though. There wasn’t a time she set foot in this church when she didn’t feel close to Mom.
    Inside, Jill and Garrett were already talking with Reverend Burke near the front of the sanctuary.
    It wasn’t going to be an elaborate ceremony, so there wasn’t much to go over in as far as a rehearsal. But that was tradition, too, so here they all were, gathering to step through it one more time to make sure Saturday would go without a hitch.
    Carolanne walked over to the Malloys. “Are they nervous?”
    Patsy Malloy laughed. “Are you kidding? I think I’m the only one nervous, and that’s just because I know I’m going to boohoolike a fool. I do it at everyone’s wedding, so I can just imagine how seeing my own son get married is going to affect me.”
    “She’ll be a weeping willow.” Mr. Malloy pulled a handkerchief out of his left pocket and then one out of his right. “It’s going to be a two-hankie day. I guarantee it.”
    “He knows me so well,” Patsy said to Carolanne.
    “I should. We’ve been married more years than we haven’t.” He reached