Always Upbeat / All That by Stephanie Perry Moore

world was upside down. I could not say my heart had been stomped on. I could not tell her I didn’t feel like going on. I just looked at her.
    Coach said, “You made a commitment to this team and to these girls. They need you. I was behind you being captain because you have something special. I need you to dig way deep. I know we all get a little moody during that time of the month …”
    With that comment I checked out on her grilling me. Shoot, I knew how to deal with my menstrual cycle. What I didn’t know how to deal with was getting people to act right. My girls were mad at me because I was tough on them. Blake broke up with me because I was busy. My dad was abandoning our family because he needed someone to “understand” him. I mean, really, in addition to being upset, I was angry.
    All this happening to me at once made me feel like it was my fault. But I didn’t deserve any of this. Like Coach said, I had a responsibility, but so did everyone else in this world. I just had to find a way to go on without my life being as perfect as I was used to it being. I told Coach all she wanted to hear and jogged back out onto the floor, finished the rest of practice, and hoped my heart would stop hurting.
    Leaving the gym, I felt depressed. I had lost my team. I had lost my friends. And I had lost my man. However, I certainly did not want the world to know about it. When I heard Eva going on and on about Blake’s new adventures, I knew as soon as I stepped outside I was going to be hot for two reasons. Yeah, I knew ninety degrees was going to feel instantly miserable, but seeing Blake flirting with the world would tear me apart.
    Eva said, “I don’t know why she wouldn’t just give it up to him. That boy is too fine to be dissatisfied. She better be glad she’s still sort of my girl or I would …”
    â€œYou wouldn’t do nothing,” Ella said to her. “Charli’s getting on my nerves too, but we’re not going to betray her.”
    â€œTell that to Whitney. Look at her hands all over him,” Hallie said, since she was in front and able to see in the parking lot.
    She turned around to face Ella, Eva, and Randal. I was behind them, and Hallie felt like she’d said too much. My big-mouthed friend put her hand to her mouth.
    â€œOh my gosh, Charli! I didn’t know you were right behind us,” Hallie said, trying to explain.
    The other three turned around. Randal had an I’m sorry look on her face. Ella mouthed the words “Sorry.” Eva shrugged her shoulders like, You get what you get . Then without real concern, they all kept walking.
    Sure enough, the sun beamed on me like I was in a hot oven. The real sweating occurred when I was most uncomfortable. There was no way I could prepare myself to see Blake leaning on his car with his hands on Whitney.
    â€œYou’re cute, but you’re in high school,” she said, “and you’re a junior too. My man’s in college, honey. Take your hands off the thighs.” She lifted both Blake’s hands off of her and tossed them to the side.
    A few other seniors ran up to him, not caring that he was just sixteen. My car was not that far away, but it seemed like miles. I knew Blake could spot me. I did not know whether to look directly at him or to intentionally look away.
    When I looked down, I heard a strong, forceful voice say, “Black, are you okay?”
    I looked back and realized that it was Blake’s dad, Coach Strong. I did not want to appear wounded, but I was keeled over. I wasn’t hydrated, and I was hurting.
    â€œYes, sir, Coach. I’m good, sir,” I said, lying to him and myself.
    Coach Strong asked, “My knucklehead son giving you problems?”
    Blake had to be looking over here because he stepped away from all the girls, went over to some of his teammates, and tried to act as if he was not showing off. I was in his dad’s PE