An Amish Match by Jo Ann Brown Page A

who’d come to cook and clean and watch over the youngsters.
    By the time they rose to go inside and spend time with the kinder , her shoulders felt lighter. She brought Sammy to sit beside her on a bench not far from the stove that would warm the room next winter. With her arm around him, she watched Joshua don a pair of dark-rimmed glasses. She’d had no idea he needed glasses.
    Joshua read from Psalm 146, and she was comforted by the words of praise. “Happy is he that hath the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the Lord his God... The Lord preserveth the strangers, He relieveth the fatherless and widow...”
    She stroked her son’s hair while he fell asleep. Holding him, she listened as Joshua continued. His warm voice rose and fell with the joyous words, and she found her own eyes growing heavy as she let the sound soothe her.
    This was the future she’d imagined when she had accepted Lloyd’s proposal. Evenings with the family gathered together, savoring the words inspired by God’s love. The perfect end to the day as the gas lamp hissed and the last light of the day faded into night. An affirmation of faith and love with the people who were in her heart.
    It wasn’t perfect. Her marriage to Joshua wasn’t a true one. However, there was no reason they couldn’t work together to make a gut and happy home. He had treated her with kindness, and she prayed she’d seen the real man and that he had no secret life as Lloyd had.
    After Joshua finished reading and the family prayed together, Rebekah took Sammy into the downstairs bedroom while Joshua and his kinder went upstairs. Their footfalls sounded along with the occasional creaking board while she settled her son into bed. He roused enough to ask for Spot, the stuffed dog he slept with each night. Telling him to stay where he was, she went into the dark kitchen. She used the flashlight she’d found in a drawer earlier, but had no luck finding Spot.
    Sammy had had the stuffed toy with him when they’d gone upstairs that afternoon. Maybe he’d left it up there somewhere. If she hurried she could retrieve it before the other kinder were asleep.
    After pausing to tell Sammy she would bring Spot to him in a few minutes, she went up the stairs far more slowly than Deborah and Levi had a few minutes ago. Gas lamps were on in the two bedrooms on the right side of the hallway. From beyond the first door to the left, she heard water splashing and guessed someone was brushing his or her teeth.
    She glanced into Deborah’s room. It was empty, and a quick scan told her Sammy’s precious toy wasn’t there. Maybe in the room the boys shared...
    As she went to look there, a voice came from the half open door on the other side of the hall. Low, deep and fraught with pain. She froze when she realized it belonged to Joshua.
    She should back away, but she couldn’t move. She saw Joshua sitting on the bed with his back to her. His head was bowed, and, at first, she thought he was praying. Then she realized he held something in his hands.
    A rag rug that was frayed with wear around the edges.
    He held it as if the worn fabric was a treasured lifeline. His gaze was so focused on the rug he was oblivious to everything else, even the fact his door had come ajar.
    Go! she told herself, but her legs refused to work.
    â€œTildie, I hope you understand why I’ve done what I have,” Joshua said. “I know you’d want our kinder to have the best care, and Rebekah is already giving them that. You told Lloyd often that he was blessed to have her as his wife. He was, and I am blessed to have her help and to be able to help her. But I miss having you here, Tildie. Nobody will ever take your place. Even if I can’t show it any longer in public now that I’m married again, I’ll never stop loving you.”
    The pain in his words matched what twisted through her heart. Her hope Joshua would be open