than I already have.”
He opened his eyes and looked at her. “What are you saying? That you’re asking me back to yours?”
Since she’d be on her own territory, her own home ground, Erin decided to take a chance. “Yes,” she said after the briefest hesitation. “But only for coffee.”
His green eyes gleamed, and he tugged his jacket tightly around her. “That’s a start. I’ll take it.”
* * * * *
Erin could barely remember saying her good-byes, since Nathan had whipped them away so fast it made her head whirl. She had a recollection of Talia’s concerned look, but Erin wasn’t going to let it push doubts into her head. She was starting to know her own mind, trust her own instincts. That knowledge had been hard won. During these last few months, she had been forced to make her own decisions, and had allowed herself to make them while reveling in her newfound freedom. Being with Nathan tonight was something she wanted, something she’d rolled over in her mind all evening, and she instinctively knew it was right for her.
It would be a kind of rite of passage, she supposed, taking the opportunity to sneak a look at Nathan as he drove her home. An assertion that she was in charge of her own life, her own sexual needs. If she went all the way—and she had a feeling that was where coffee would lead—it would be just for a night. The scratching of an itch. For both of them. She knew his reputation. Was brutally aware that he enjoyed sex but didn’t do relationships, preferring to move on. That suited her fine. Like she’d told him, she didn’t want forever-after either. In fact, at this point in her life, she wanted to be like Nathan and enjoy sex for its own sake without the ties and complications that came from an involvement that went beyond the brief and the physical. Living this way ensured she would never risk losing herself again.
On the surface, Nathan shared similar attributes to Justin. Powerful, enigmatic and self-assured. Except, in retrospect, Justin’s power was superficial, while Nathan’s seemed innate. He was enigmatic, but again it wasn’t on the surface. It was integral to who he was, that mysterious quality that she couldn’t quite define or label.
Plus, he was sexy as hell, whereas Justin hadn’t really done it for her. Her only attraction to him had been because he’d shown her attention. At the beginning of their relationship, he had lavished it on her. She’d never had that from her parents. They’d been too busy with their own lives, with their own careers, to worry about spending time with their only child. Justin had made her feel wanted, admired. Then he’d controlled her, manipulated her. He’d found her Achilles’ heel and played on it. At first, she’d been too young, too impressionable to see through it, but it hadn’t taken long before she’d realized she was trapped by a monster.
Now she was slowly rebuilding her confidence, reasserting her own power, making her own decisions. An integral part of that meant acting on her own needs and desires, while continuing to protect herself in any way she deemed necessary.
Buoyed by that understanding, Erin stopped at her front door and looked up at Nathan. “Willa, my dog. It’ll probably be best if you just ignore her.”
He held out his hand for her key and, without a word, unlocked the door. He stood back, and Erin stepped into her hallway. Already halfway to the door, Willa froze, her eyes huge and wary as she stared at Nathan. With a pitiful whine, she started to back away, her ears pinned back to her skull.
Erin felt a pang. She hated that Willa was still so scared and had hoped that by now she might be starting to trust again. “Come on, baby. Everything’s fine. Nobody’s going to hurt you.”
Erin went down the hall, aware that Nathan closed the door behind them. Willa’s attention was fully on Nathan and she hid behind Erin when they made their way into the kitchen.
At the threshold, Nathan