Beginnings - SF2 by Susan X Meagher

difference nonetheless. Kissing you and touching you gets me really, really turned on and that's something that didn't happen much with men. I guess I'm allowing myself to get used to that feeling."
    "And not having sex with you allows me to experience what it's like to be turned on and not be satisfied immediately," Ryan informed her. "And as frustrating as that is, I think it's good for me."
    "Really?" Jamie asked shyly. "You really think you're learning something from this?"
    Ryan grasped her hand and brought it to her lips. She kissed it gently on the palm and held it to her cheek for a moment. "I am, Jamie. I'm learning what it is that I want from sex."
    "Tell me, Ryan," she begged.
    "I've learned that sex becomes lovemaking when we touch each other not just with out bodies but with our souls. It's lovemaking when I welcome you to touch me in ways no one else ever has or ever will. It's lovemaking when I show you the essence of myself, stripped of pretense and façade. Lovemaking is sharing souls, Jamie. It's profound and poetic, intimate and intense. Nothing less will do when we're together." She trailed her fingers through Jamie's soft blonde hair and smiled as her partner snuggled close. "I've been with many, many, women, Jamie, but I swear I've never made love before," she pledged. "When we share that experience it's going to be a first for both of us."
    "That was so beautiful," Jamie whispered as she lifted her head for several achingly tender kisses. "God, you take my breath away." She dropped her head onto Ryan's chest and nuzzled contentedly for a few minutes. "It's gonna be wonderful between us." Lifting her head she gazed right into Ryan's eyes. "I love you, Ryan."
    "And I love you, Jamie." They cuddled together on the loveseat for a few minutes, nuzzling their faces into each other's necks, until Jamie sat up and sneezed.
    "I'm at a disadvantage here," she complained as she grasped a handful of Ryan's long hair.
    "Hand me a scissors," Ryan ordered as she attempted to get up.
    "You goof! Sit right back down here and tell me how we're going to control ourselves."
    "Okay," she nodded decisively. "I've got a plan. Now, I don't like it, but it's a plan."
    "What is it, Ryan?" Jamie asked, concerned about the sour look on her friend's face.
    "I volunteer to keep us on the straight and narrow," she said firmly, even though she looked slightly ill.
    "Oh, Honey, I can't ask you to do that!"
    "You didn't ask," Ryan reminded her. "It's hazardous duty but I think it's only fair that I volunteer."
    "Fair? How so?" Jamie asked.
    Ryan shifted a little bit and traced her thumb down the baby-soft cheek as she cradled her partner's face in her hand. "This is brand-spanking new for you, Jamie. Even ignoring the same-sex aspect you haven't had much experience in playing with your libido. I want to give you that gift. I promise to do my very best to keep a lid on while you feel free to explore."
    The smaller woman sat immobile for a moment, stunned by the overly generous offer. "I…I don't think I can accept, Ryan," she said softly.
    "Why?" Ryan asked. "I really think this is the best way."
    "It's too unequal," Jamie complained. "I don't want you to be responsible for both of us."
    "Jamie," she said as she leaned forward and brushed her forehead with her lips. "I've been unleashing my rabid libido on innocent young women for 6 years," she said with just a touch of hyperbole. "I think it will be good for me to learn a little restraint. Please let me give you this gift."
    The fair-haired woman sat quietly for a moment, considering the offer carefully. "Are you really certain that you won't resent me?" she asked.
    "I'm positive. This gift is freely given. I'll do my best to let you explore, but if it gets too hard I'll let you know. You just have to promise to pull back if I tell you to."
    "Hmm, that might be tough," Jamie laughed. "But if you can offer nearly a mile I can go the last few feet."
    "Deal," Ryan said happily. She got up