Betrayal by Aubrey St. Clair

thoughts, my phone began to ring and the caller ID said it was Harry calling from Toronto.  I hadn't heard from him in a few days, my anger dissipating enough that I felt I was ready to talk to him.  Briefly.
    "Hi Harry," I answered.
    "Lila.  Hi.  Thanks for answering."  There's a silence on the phone.  I don't really know what to say.  "So, uh, how ya doing?"
    "I'm okay.  Look, Harry..."
    "I know, I know.  I was a dick.  I know.  I guess I just... I wanted to apologize.  Sometimes I just get carried away in the moment..."
    "You hurt me, Harry.  You offered me up as a prize in a poker game."  I thought I was mostly over it, but being with Chase so soon after it happened likely just distracted me from the pain.  The pain of feeling like I was worth so little to Harry, but also the pain of losing our relationship even though I knew it was over even before we got to Vegas.
    "I know.  I'm sorry.  Can we get past this?"
    I walk towards one of the bikes on the showroom, running my hand idly along the leather seat and up to the chrome handlebars as I talk.  "Not in the way we were.  We're done, you understand that don't you Harry?  It's not just about the poker game.  It wasn't working before that."
    "I know."  I hear a sadness in his voice, a resignedness to the way things are now that I didn't hear last time we spoke.  "I'm just hoping me can still be friends."
    "In time.  We can talk about it more when I get back."
    "Do you know when that will be?  What are you doing out there anyway?"  That second question isn't one I want to answer, so I focus on the first.
    "I'm not sure.  But when I'm back I'll give you a call, okay?  We can talk about things then."  By then maybe I'll be ready to talk about Chase.  By then I might understand myself where this is going.
    "Okay.  I'm really sorry, Lila.  I'll always care about you, you know that, right?"
    "I do," I say.  My anger toward him is gone, and so is the love I thought I once felt.  But I don't wish him any harm.  He'll always be a part of my past even if he isn't part of my future.  "I feel the same way, Harry.  But I gotta go now, okay?  We'll talk soon."
    I hang up, happier that I took the call than I thought I'd be.  It was good to get a bit of closure with him.  I feel like he gets that it's over now, and he accepts it.
    "Ready to go?"
    My head snaps around to see Chase standing in the door to the office.  I'm not sure how much of that conversation he heard, if any.  His face gives nothing away, as usual. 
     
    * * *
     
    I'm hunched forward with my arms locked around Chase's stomach as the motorcycle thunders down a desert road.  I have no idea how fast we're going, but I'm absolutely certain it's faster than the speed limit.  It's also faster than I'm sure I've ever gone on land.  I'm terrified, but at the same time exhilarated.  My blood is pumping quickly, pushed through my veins by a pounding heart, and I would need a crowbar to loosen my grip.  But at the same time, it's exciting.  And the vibrations of the bike coming up from between my legs is achingly distracting, making my thoughts turn to Chase and whether or not our ride will end at a place where I can fuck him silly.
    We continue racing through the desert, a cloud of sand forming behind us in our wake even though we're technically following a road.  After a while we begin to pass a few signs that whip past me before I even have a chance to read them, but they lead us to a small little airport before Chase begins to finally slow.  As he pulls us to a stop I'm finally able to focus on where we are.
    I rip off my helmet.  "Are you kidding me?  Skydiving?  You want to go skydiving?"
    Chase pulls his helmet off as well, a huge grin plastered across his face.  "You'll love it."
    He wears that grin all through our training session, where our instructors go through all of the things to know about jumping.  I'm terrified, but unwilling to give Chase the satisfaction of