Beyond by Graham McNamee

voice. “S-sorry. Sorry. I don’t know what …”
    “You look flushed. Any fever?”
    She puts the back of her hand against my forehead.
    “No, Mom.”
    “Any headache?”
    “Nothing. Really. I just … I thought I heard something in the coolers. Something wrong.”
    Mom goes to open the door that was dripping with blood a moment ago.
    Don’t! I want to shout. Something’s in there.
    She pokes her head inside. I hold my breath, waiting for her scream. She checks the thermometer. Looking over her shoulder, I see only the flowers and arrangements. Nothing more.
    “Seems fine.” She closes the door.
    I fake a normal face real quick. “Good. That’s good. Um … if you don’t need me, I’m gonna take off now.”
    She starts filing away her delivery slips. “You want to wait around an hour and I’ll drive you home?”
    “That’s okay.” I reach for my coat. “I could use some air.”
    “Well, call and let me know when you get home, then.”
    I nod, grabbing an umbrella on my way out.
    The rain’s coming down hard, turning the street into a shallow stream. Even with the umbrella I’m going to get soaked, but I don’t care. I need to get away from here.

I’m too shaky and wired to go home, can’t be alone right now. I need somebody to talk me down.
    So I go see my Creep Sister.
    Lexi reads my face as soon as she opens her door.
    “That bad?”
    I shiver a nod, and she lets me in out of the rain. Warming up over a mug of coffee in her room above the garage, I replay what just happened.
    “Are you sure you weren’t dreaming?” she says. “You said you were nodding off right before.”
    “I don’t know. It felt so real, Lexi.”
    “Yeah. But the past few days … I mean, you’re getting no sleep, that nail’s screwing with your wiring, you just cheated death by landslide, and you’re superstressed.”
    Now that I’ve put a little distance between me and what happened in the shop, my own doubts are starting to creep in.
    “I feel like I’m losing it.”
    “You’re safe now. Just breathe, Jane.”
    I let out a shaky sigh, trying to get my speeding heartto slow down. The rain patters on the roof, soft and hushing.
    “There’s this thing I read about,” Lexi says. “Sort of a sleep disorder. Hypnagogia .”
    “What’s that?”
    “It’s like having waking dreams. When you’re half-asleep, and the line between conscious and unconscious gets blurred. It can happen if you’re stressed and sleep deprived, or it can be a side effect of some medications.”
    “I’m taking a fistful of meds every day.”
    “With all those drugs in your system, maybe you’re having a bad reaction.”
    “Real bad.” I drink the last of my coffee, letting it defrost me. “You think that’s what it was? Felt like more than a dream.”
    “These hypnagogia things are supposed to seem hyperreal. Where you’re still aware of your actual surroundings, but your subconscious splices a little something extra into the scene.”
    “So it’s like a hallucination?”
    “Yeah. But that doesn’t make you a lunatic.”
    “This stuff ever happen to you?”
    “No. I mean, I only get maybe three hours of sleep a night, but I don’t feel deprived. I’m just wired.” She bugs out her eyes at me.
    I smile. Lexi’s my real shrink and dream doctor.
    I set my empty mug down on her desk. Caffeine probably wasn’t a great idea. Feels like I’m going to jump out of my skin. I try to walk it off, pacing around her room.
    Lexi’s been working on a new project, and it covers the wall above her desk. Guess I’m the inspiration for it.
    A gallery of images show what the Great Beyond looks like. Lots of glowing doorways, and heavenly cloudscapes with gates opened wide. The phantom souls of the newly dead hovering above their own lifeless bodies. Helpful spirits pointing out the way to the other side.
    “So, Lexi, when you were digging all this up, did you find anything that was like my own bad trip?”
    “You’re kind of