Closed Off To You (Singing Star Trilogy #1) by Rachel S. Rose

change.
    “I understand that perfectly. We have to go after our dreams. We can’t let anyone get in our way. Maybe if you spoke to them… I don’t even know why I’m saying that. I have no idea what I’m talking about.” It was true. I wasn’t exactly the best friend a man could have. The whole time I had been sitting next to her, I had been fantasising about ripping the blanket off and crawling up her body. But I couldn’t do that.
    “So… How long have you been single?”
    The sudden change in topic made her sit up. Her thoughts would be racing, just the way I wanted. If I distracted her, she might stop questioning me.
    “Quite a while,” she said, kicking the blanket so that it no longer covered her feet. She didn’t have any socks on. I reached down and ran a finger down the length of her big toe. Her eyes closed briefly and her breath deepened as I pushed my finger through her toes.
    “I thought I made myself clear about this,” she muttered.
    She was affected by me. Her cheeks glowed when I picked up her foot and put it in my lap. Massaging her heel, I glanced over.
    “What? I’m just giving you a foot massage.” I was being naughty.
    “Are you, now? Is this what they teach you in class or something?”
    I stiffened, my hands going still. Her foot went rigid as she felt the change in me. Why was she so insistent on bringing up our age difference? I hadn’t been in school for years. Did she really see me as a boy instead of a man?
    “See, we don’t want the same things. You might be wildly handsome, but that doesn’t mean I’m just going to settle for sex.” Melissa tugged her foot out of my grasp. I let her go.
    “Why can’t you just go with the flow? We both felt this the last time we were together, didn’t we? Why not just go with it now?”
    I finished my tea and sat forward on the sofa. My game was up. She was too closed off, not prepared to let anyone in.
    “You only want one thing. You’re too young. I’ve had a really, really long day.” Melissa tucked her feet back into the blanket and regarded me from under her eyelids.
    “Fair enough. I’m sorry for being a dick.” Getting up, I expected her to see me out. Instead, she stayed where she was and turned the sound up on the television.
    I resisted the urge to lean down and kiss her goodbye. She was right. We both wanted different things.
    “It was good to know you, Nathan. I hope you find what you’re looking for.”
    I didn’t reply as I left the flat. There was no point. Her indifference puzzled me. She wanted to date, yet, she wasn’t even going to get off the sofa to see me out of her home.
    The woman was a contradiction.
     

Chapter Eight
     
    “I’ve decided to give it a go. For you,” I announced.
    Lizzie and Ella screamed in my ear as they jumped up and down and threw their arms around me. I tried to keep my composure, but their excitement was contagious. I squealed with them as we did a celebratory dance.
    “What made you change your mind?” Lizzie asked.
    We were in the woods, walking Lizzie’s dog. Her passion was animals as well as singing. She worked with dogs every day.
    “Nathan, actually.”
    They paused in their stride as we got nearer to the stream. “Nathan? When did you speak to Nathan?” Ella asked.
    She dug in her pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. Her tall willowy frame was clad in skinny jeans and a thick jumper. She was one of those humans that felt the cold easily. So much so, that me and Lizzie bought her a new hat every year for a joke.
    “He came to my house after the pub the other day,” I said, snatching the piece of paper out of her hand when she didn’t give it to me.
    Looking down at what she’d written, I rolled my eyes. Lizzie held out her hand so I gave it to her. Ella had written, what she called, a prediction. Nathan would hook up with me again, according to her.
    “We didn’t do anything. He wants to be friends with benefits. You know I don’t want that.”
    Lizzie