Complete Works, Volume I by Harold Pinter Page A

bar.
    GOLDBERG . Keep a table reserved
    MCCANN . Help you acknowledge the fast days.
    GOLDBERG . Bake you cakes.
    MCCANN . Help you kneel on kneeling days.
    GOLDBERG . Give you a free pass.
    MCCANN . Take you for constitutionals.
    GOLDBERG . Give you hot tips.
    MCCANN . Well provide the skipping rope.
    GOLDBERG . The vest and pants.
    MCCANN . The ointment.
    GOLDBERG . The hot poultice.
    MCCANN . The fingerstall.
    GOLDBERG . The abdomen belt.
    MCCANN . The ear plugs.
    GOLDBERG . The baby powder.
    MCCANN . The back scratcher.
    GOLDBERG . The spare tyre.
    MCCANN . The stomach pump.
    GOLDBERG . The oxygen tent.
    MCCANN . The prayer wheel.
    GOLDBERG . The plaster of Paris.
    MCCANN . The crash helmet.
    GOLDBERG . The crutches.
    MCCANN . A day and night service.
    GOLDBERG . All on the house.
    MCCANN . That's it.
    GOLDBERG . We'll make a man of you.
    MCCANN . And a woman.
    GOLDBERG . You'll be re-orientated.
    MCCANN . You'll be rich.
    GOLDBERG . You'll be adjusted.
    MCCANN . You'll be our pride and joy.
    GOLDBERG . You'll be a mensch.
    MCCANN . You'll be a success.
    GOLDBERG . You'll be integrated.
    MCCANN . You'll give orders.
    GOLDBERG . You'll make decisions.
    MCCANN . You'll be a magnate.
    GOLDBERG . A statesman.
    MCCANN . You'll own yachts.
    GOLDBERG . Animals.
    MCCANN . Animals.
    GOLDBERG looks at MCCANN .
    GOLDBERG . I said animals. ( He turns back to STANLEY .) You'll be able to make or break, Stan. By my life. ( Silence. STANLEY is still. ) Well? What do you say?
    STANLEY’S head lifts very slowly and turns in GOLDBERG’S direction.
    GOLDBERG . What do you think? Eh, boy?
    STANLEY begins to clench and unclench his eyes.
    MCCANN . What's your opinion, sir? Of this prospect, sir?
    GOLDBERG . Prospect. Sure. Sure it's a prospect.
    STANLEY’S hands clutching his glasses begin to tremble.
    What's your opinion of such a prospect? Eh, Stanley?
    STANLEY concentrates, his mouth opens, he attempts to speak, fails and emits sounds from his throat.
    STANLEY . Uh-gug . . . uh-gug . . . eeehhh-gag . . . ( On the breath. ) Caahh . . . caahh. . . .
    They watch him. He draws a long breath which shudders down his body. He concentrates.
    GOLDBERG . Well, Stanny boy, what do you say, eh?
    They watch. He concentrates. His head lowers, his chin draws into his chest, he crouches.
    STANLEY . Ug-gughh . . . uh-gughhh. . . .
    MCCANN . What's your opinion, sir?
    STANLEY . Caaahhh . . . caaahhh. . . .
    MCCANN . Mr Webber! What's your opinion?
    GOLDBERG . What do you say, Stan? What do you think of the prospect?
    MCCANN . What's your opinion of the prospect?
    STANLEY’S body shudders, relaxes, his head drops, he becomes still again, stooped . PETEY enters from door, downstage, left.
    GOLDBERG . Still the same old Stan. Come with us. Come on, boy.
    MCCANN . Come along with us.
    PETEY . Where are you taking him?
    They turn. Silence.
    GOLDBERG . We're taking him to Monty.
    PETEY . He can stay here.
    GOLDBERG . Don't be silly.
    PETEY . We can look after him here.
    GOLDBERG . Why do you want to look after him?
    PETEY . He's my guest.
    GOLDBERG . He needs special treatment.
    PETEY . We'll find someone.
    GOLDBERG . No. Monty's the best there is. Bring him, McCann.
    They help STANLEY out of the chair. They all three move towards the door, left.
    PETEY . Leave him alone!
    They stop . GOLDBERG studies him.
    GOLDBERG ( insidiously ). Why don't you come with us, Mr Boles?
    MCCANN . Yes, why don't you come with us?
    GOLDBERG . Come with us to Monty. There's plenty of room in the car.
    PETEY makes no move. They pass him and reach the door. MCCANN opens the door and picks up the suitcases.
    PETEY ( broken ). Stan, don't let them tell you what to do!
    They exit.
    Silence, PETEY stands. The front door slams. Sound of a car starting. Sound of a car going away. Silence, PETEY slowly goes to the table. He sits on a chair, left. He picks up the paper and opens it. The strips fall to the floor. He looks down at them, MEG comes past the window and enters by the back door.