Diary of a Wimpy Kid by Jeff Kinney

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    That's the last thing I remember before I blacked out.
    I came to my senses a few hours later. After I woke up, I cracked the door open, and I heard snoring coming from Fregley's room. So I decided to make a run for it.
    Mom and Dad were not happy with me for getting them out of bed at 2:00 in the morning. But by that point, I could really care less.
    [Image: a cartoon showing a boy knocking at the door.]
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    Monday

    Well, me and Rowley have officially been ex-friends for about a month now, and to be honest with you, I'm better off without him.
    I'm glad I can just do whatever I want without having to worry about carrying all that dead weight around.
    Lately I've been hanging out in Rodrick's room after school and going through his stuff. The other day, I found one of his middle school yearbooks.
    [Image: a cartoon showing a boy looking at things in a drawer.]
    Rodrick wrote on everybody's picture in his yearbook, so you can tell how he felt about all the kids in his grade.
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    [Image: a picture of a boy] The Caption reads: "Jerk"
    [Image: a picture of a boy] The Caption reads: "cool"
    Every once in a while, I see Rodrick's old classmates around town. And I have to remember to thank Rodrick for making church a lot more interesting.
    [Image: a cartoon showing a boy in a Church.]
    But the page in Rodrick's yearbook that's really interesting is the Class Favorites page.
    That's where they put pictures of the kids who get voted Most Popular and Most Talented and all that.
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    Rodrick wrote on his Class Favorites page, too.
    [Image: a cartoon showing Bill Watson and Kathy Nguyen.] The Caption reads: "Nerd"
    You know, this Class Favorites thing has really got my gears turning.
    If you can get yourself voted onto the Class Favorites page, you're practically an immortal. Even if you don't live up to what you got picked for, it doesn't really matter, because it's on permanent record.
    People still treat Bill Watson like he's something special, even though he ended up dropping out of high school.
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    We still run into him at the Food Barn every once in a while.
    [Image: a cartoon showing a boy and his mom in a shop.] The Caption reads: "Will that be paper or plastic, Ma'am?"
    So here's what I'm thinking: This school year has been kind of a bust, but if I can get voted as a Class Favorite, I'll go out on a high note.
    I've been trying to think of a category I have a shot at. Most Popular and Most Athletic are definitely out, so I'm going to have to find something that's a little bit more in reach.
    At first I thought maybe I should wear really nice clothes for the rest of the year so I can get Best Dressed.
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    But that would mean I would have to get my picture taken with Jenna Stewart, and she dresses like a Pilgrim.
    [Image: a cartoon showing a boy and a girl.]

    Wednesday

    Last night I was lying in bed, and it hit me: I should go for Class Clown.
    It's not like I'm known for being real funny at school or anything, but if I can pull off one big prank right before voting, that could do it.
    [Image: a cartoon showing children playing a prank in the classroom.] The Caption reads: "YEEOWW!"
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    MAY

    Thursday

    Today I was trying to figure out how I was going to sneak a thumbtack onto Mr. Worth's chair in History when he said something that made me rethink my plan.
    Mr. Worth told us he has a dentist's appointment tomorrow, so we're going to have a substitute. Subs are like comic gold. You can say just about anything you want, and you can't get in trouble.
    [Image: a cartoon showing children in a classroom.] The Caption reads: "Greg Heffley will you please do this problem?, excuse me?, well, I hardly think that's...
    Your MAMA!, your book fanny granny! Your slap happy grandpappy!"
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    Friday

    I walked into my History class today, ready to execute my plan. But when I got to the door, guess who the substitute teacher was?
    [Image: a cartoon showing children in a classroom.] The Caption reads: " Hi, honey