Firstlife by Gena Showalter

him—” no boy is ever going to factor into my decision, because they don’t come with a guarantee, either “—he won’t be rewarded.”
    She stands and walks over to pat me on my cheek. “Wow. You’re, like, Super Naive Girl.”
    In the back of my mind, I note the temperature of her skin. Like James, she’s too cool, as if she’s incapable of absorbing heat.
    Try to warm me up, James used to say.
    â€œSo... Killian will be rewarded?” I ask.
    â€œWell, yeah. Everything we do has a consequence. Good or bad. In Firstlife and Everlife.” She tilts her head and studies me more intently. “Who’s your ML?”
    â€œI’ve always had two at a time. Many have come and gone, but one has always remained the same. Madame Pearl Bennett.” A flawless blonde with a warm smile.
    Distaste darkens Bow’s features. “Madame is the title for a Leader, which is step above a Laborer.”
    â€œYes.” A fact I’d pointed out to Madame Bennett as soon as I learned about the different positions. She’d smiled sweetly and said, You, my beauty, are special. I want to oversee your case myself.
    I’d asked what made me so special, and her smile had only grown. You remind me of someone I loved and like her, you’re going to do great things for our realm.
    I’d adored her. Once. She was the one who told my parents to send me to Prynne. I’d heard them talking. At first, my dad resisted the idea. When Madame promised him the experience would toughen me up, help me become the person I was meant to be, and snap me out of my pouty teenage refusal to sign with Myriad, he finally relented. Then he convinced my mother.
    â€œWell,” Bow says, and I can’t tell what emotion she’s projecting. I only know it’s negative. “You must be as important to Myriad as you are to Troika. No one I know has ever had two MLs.”
    Me, either. But... “Myriad doesn’t have Conduits.”
    â€œNo, they have Abrogates. Those who extinguish the light. The most powerful people in their realm.” She glares at me. “If you sign with Myriad, you won’t only deny Troika a Conduit, you’ll drain the Conduits we do have.”
    I rub the back of my neck. “What would happen then?”
    â€œTroika would plunge into darkness right alongside Myriad. It’s what the other realm has always wanted. It’s what we’ve always fought.” Bow bites her lower lip. “Are you sure you can resist Killian’s...charms?”
    â€œDefinitely.” His eyes make my blood sing... “Possibly. Hopefully.” His smirking mouth and blatant innuendos make my blood boil... “Definitely.”
    She pushes out a heavy breath. “Do you have any experience with the opposite sex?”
    â€œI’ve had a boyfriend,” I tell her, suddenly defensive.
    â€œHere? He was human?”
    â€œOf course.”
    â€œHow do you know?” she asks.
    â€œHow else? I was allowed to touch him.” Every Laborer comes to earth in a Shell, a humanoid outer casing that somehow makes a spirit tangible to the physical world.
    Despite that tangibility, we’re forbidden from touching the Shells for any reason. Without being told why!
    She crosses her arms. “What was he like? This boyfriend?”
    â€œHis name was James. I met him my first week. He snuck me food when I was starved and salve every time I was beaten.” The true miracle? In the quiet of the night, he made me laugh. “Why the curiosity about him?”
    â€œDuh. I’m nosy. You know this. Was he Unsigned?”
    â€œNo. He was secretly a Myriad loyalist—” Vans would have fired him if he’d known “—but he rarely talked realm business with me.” He saw me , not a potential realm-mate.
    â€œAh.” She makes a face as she nods. “He was doing the long con.”
    â€œExcuse me?” What