Flip Side of the Game by Tu-Shonda L. Whitaker

Lee rolled her eyes and said, “Everybody’s coochie can’t tolerate a thousand dicks at once, ho.”
    â€œHo? You the trick bein’ played by a goddamn televangelist!”
    â€œOh, no you didn’t go there!” she screamed.
    â€œYes, I did!”
    See, let me tell y’all somethin’. The only reason I could stand her was because she was like a pain-in-the-ass sister, and we’d been friends since we were eight. Otherwise, I woulda cold-cocked her stank-ass the minute she stood up in my face and started runnin’ her mouth.
    I turned to her and said, “Here we are, looking out for you, and you talkin’ major shit.”
    â€œFirst of all, Miz Thang, y’all got issues with men, so can’t none of y’all open your mouth to tell me nothin’ about my man.”
    â€œLee,” Shannon said, still trying to be calm, “you really need to be quiet, because we love you and would never tell you anything that would hurt you.”
    â€œShannon,” I turned to her and said, “why are you trying to baby this ho? Lee is a big girl. If she wanna be the black version of Joann Buttafuoco, sit back, and bask in the essence of getting dogged, then by all means, let the bitch! ’Cause you know me, and my sympathy goes two places, to the starving kids in Ethiopia, and to Luther when he gains weight. That’s right, that’s the extent of it, so I don’t feel sorry for Lee.”
    I turned to Lee and said, “If you like it, I’m in love wit’ it.”
    â€œThat ain’t right, Vera,” Angie chimed in.
    â€œYou know Luther sick. He can’t help his situation. Somebody gonna fuck you up for that one. You need to apologize.”
    Oh, now they wanted to gang up on a sista. “Shut up, Angela! Luther ain’t even here. You need to be worried about dumb-dumb over there.”
    â€œCall me out my name again,” Lee said, dropping her things on the floor.
    I just looked at the heifer, ’cause it’s amazing what a good piece of dick will do to ya. This heifer ain’t never won a fight in her life, and now she wanted to fight me!
    â€œExcuse you?” I said, looking her up and down. “You wanna do something? If you don’t, sit yo’ ass down.”
    â€œLee, you are way outta line!” Shannon said, jumping in between us.
    â€œI can’t believe this shit,” Angie said. “Maybe I need to go back to Alabama, ’cause y’all New York bitches are crazy. Now, Lee,” Angie said with a Southern twang, “I understand that you love James. I respect that. But the nigga is a pastor, and he’s dogging you. Nobody here is jealous. We’re just being honest with you.”
    â€œI got yo’ honest,” Lee said, pointing around the room.
    â€œYou, you, and you need to mind your business, ya fake-ass Oprah and Gail King wannabes!” She picked up her stuff and left our dumb-asses sittin’ there.

    It had been three weeks since I had heard from the ho, with the exception of the chain letter e-mails she’d been sending me. But, as sure as my name is Vera, I was certain that her day would come. I just didn’t think it would be this soon.
    I was in the middle of gettin’ my groove on and Shannon called. I was breathing heavy, sweatin’ and shit. Taj was hittin’ that spot, and right at the point where all my juices were about to explode, Shannon yelled into the answering machine for me to pick up the phone! Goddamn it! But she said that it was an emergency.
    â€œWhat, Shannon?” Stay right there , I said to Taj with my eyes, trying to get him not to move.
    â€œShannon, what do you want? I’m busy!”
    â€œBitch! You done had more than enough dick to last you two or three lifetimes. You shoulda done made yo’ money, ho. So sit up, roll over, or whatever you got to do, but you gonna have to hear this