Fran Rizer - Callie Parrish 05 - Mother Hubbard Has a Corpse in the Cupboard by Fran Rizer

look just like her,” I agreed as I led her back to my office. I’d decided I would have to do Miss Nila’s hair and makeup there where I’d already put her clothes and the supplies I’d need. I’m not supposed to take anyone into my work room, but I wished I could lay her out on the table and let her sleep it off. I nudged Miss Nila to sit down in my office chair.
    Now, I know as well as anyone else that coffee doesn’t really sober people, but I hoped it would at least help. I left her sitting there while I went to the kitchen. Forget about the dainty Wedewood china with silver coffee service on a tray. I poured a cup of black coffee into a mug and got out of the kitchen just in time to see Miss Nila Gorman staggering back toward Slumber Room A with a set of car keys dangling from her right hand.
    “I’m taking you home, Nina. Gonna take you home with me,” she cried.
    I couldn’t let her drive away in her condition, and I certainly couldn’t let her take her deceased sister out of the casket in any condition.
    “Miss Gorman,” I said as I caught up with her, “don’t you want to come with me and let me do your hair and help you dress up just like your sister?” I set the coffee mug on a table and lifted the car keys from her hand. I gently took hold of the elderly lady. It would be just my luck for her to fall and hurt herself on my watch.
    “No!” She was adamant. “I want to take Nina home and forget all about this place.”
    “Now, you know Miss Nina’s friends and relatives are coming in a few hours to show their respect for Miss Nina. We need to get you prettied up.”
    “Oh, that’s right. Show respect for my sister. Where’s the beauty parlor? I’ve gotta get ready.”
    I led her back to my office and once more nudged her into the chair. She sat still, closed her eyes, and soon began snoring as I curled her hair on tiny rollers and misted it with super hold hair spray. I let it set while I manicured her nails and then tweezed the wiry white stray hairs from her eyebrows. Buh-leeve me. If I can tweeze someone’s brows and not wake that person up, she’s not sleeping. She’s either passed out or dead. I leaned over and listened. I could hear her breathing. Her sleeping didn’t bother me. I’m used to working on people who stay quiet and still.
    At a quarter ’til six, I awoke Miss Gorman (Nila, not Nina) and coerced her into drinking two cups of coffee. I still didn’t believe it would sober her up, but I hoped the caffeine might help her look more alive than her sister. I helped Miss Nila into her dress and accessories and silently marveled at how clear-headed she seemed. But then, I had an idea that Miss Nila had lots of practice sobering up or at least pretending to since I now remembered that she’d been tipsy at my brother’s wedding shower.
    “Amazing Grace” announced the first arrivals at the visitation. Less than thirty minutes after it began, Otis came in.
    “Good job, Callie,” he said. “They look just alike.”
    I didn’t know if that meant they both looked dead like Miss Nina or they both looked alive like Miss Nila, so I just thanked him for the compliment.
    Otis smiled and added, “You can leave now, and I’ll see you in the morning.”
    He didn’t have to tell me twice. I called Jane and told her I was headed to the hospital to check on Maum. “Do you need anything?”
    “Nope,” she answered. “I’m thinking about cooking dinner, and I expect you and Tyrone to eat here when you leave the hospital, not at your dad’s.”
    “Why would I eat at Daddy’s?”
    “I was supposed to tell you that John showed up this morning, so your daddy’s cooking stew and playing music tonight. I told Frankie I’d rather stay home. I’m still not feeling good.”
    “Then just send Frankie to Daddy’s. Why cook?”
    “Because I want to, and that should be reason enough. I’m tired of people telling me what to do.”
    Jane’s mention of food made me think Rizzie