Kissing Hitler
Iâve tried to keep the landscape
buried in my chest, in its teak box,
but tonight, awakened
by the sound of my name
strung between the trees,
I see the box on my nightstand
giving off the kind of light
you never know you belong to
until you see it dance
from a pile of metal shavings
or shaken loose
from a sword fernâs root-wad.
Itâs the same light that trailed me
the entire summer of my sixteenth year,
driving County Road 64
toward Power Line Ridge,
the three radio towers
blinking in the Oregon dark.
Between each red pulse
the dark hung its birthrights in front of me,
a few dead branches
crawling up from the ditch,
a lost bolt of mooncloth
snagged on a barbed-wire fence,
shredding in the tide wind.
The light my oldest friends
slammed into their veins
or offered to the night
when they made amends.
One of them,
the tallest and toughest,
the one who used to show up Saturdays
for my motherâs breakfastâ
he could juggle five eggs
and recite the alphabet backwardâ
he told me as he covered my hand with his
while I downshifted to enter the gravel quarry
that he wanted to punch the baby
out of Jessicaâs stomachâ
heâs the one, tonight, whose carbide hands
have opened the lid of this little box.
I can see the two of us now, kissing Hitler.
Thatâs what we called itâ
siphoning gas,
huffing shop rags.
And we kissed him everywhere,
in other counties,
with girls we barely knew
telling us to hurry
before someone called the cops.
They canât arrest you for kissing Hitler.
Thatâs what we said.
The last time I saw him
he sat on the edge
of his fatherâs girlfriendâs bathtub,
bleeding and laughing hard into a pink towel.
I canât rememberâ
maybe it was a birthday party.
Maybe weâd climbed in
through the living room window,
looking for a bottle or some pills,
at the same moment the adults stumbled in
from the Silver Dollar, hardwired
to liquor and crystal.
That was the summer
when people just went crazy.
And there we were, locked in the bathroom,
someone yelling and throwing themselves
against the door,
my friendâs blood fanned out behind him
into points of red tar,
into points so fine they made me think
that someone, somewhere,
must belong to a family that passes down
the art of painting immaculate nasturtiums
along the lips of bone china,
the smallest detail touched into place
by a single, stiff horsehair,
by a young father holding his breath,
trying not to wake the child
swaddled at his feet, his hand
steady as five white mining burros
sleeping in the rain.
New Civilian
The new law
says you can abandon your child
in an emergency room,
no questions asked.
A young father
carries his sleeping boy
through the hospital doors.
Later, parked at the boat basin,
he takes a knife from his pocket,
cuts an unfiltered cigarette in two,
lights the longer half in his mouth.
He was a medic in the war.
In his basement are five bronze eagles
that once adorned the walls
of a dictatorâs palace.
Dead Manâs Bells, Witchesâ Gloves
The dreams of those buried in winter
push through the ground in summer.
Among the orders, my dead
belong to the ditches of county roads.
Before the new people came over
to negotiate the easement
with their version of a city lawyer,
my mother hung dozens of foxgloves
above our door.
A dead crow hung by its feet
from the same hook.
Even in death, that purple luster
is a kind of singing.
Catfish
The catfish have the night,
but I have patience
and a bucket of chicken guts.
I have canned corn and shad blood.
And Iâve nothing better to do
than listen to the waterâs riffled dark
spill into the deep eddy
where a â39 Ford coupe
rests in the muck-bottom.
The dare growing up:
to swim down with pliers
for the license plates,
corpse bones, a little chrome...
But even