How To Be A Perfect Girl by Mary Williams

easy.”
    “Exactly. Now, you just take each number in
the equation and do to it what you did to the variable. So five
times four divided by three is—?”
    “Twenty thirds.”
    “It’s easier to use your calculator and
write down the number it gives you to a few decimals,” Carrie
remarked.
    “Alright, so it’s six and point six six,”
Val wrote the number down. “And then on the other side I take this
gunk and do the same thing?” ‘This gunk’ referred to a collection
of numbers and operations on the right side.
    “It’s easier to simplify it first.” Keenan
smiled encouragingly, “But yeah, once you simplify it you just
multiply it by four thirds.”
    “Oh, alright.” Val entered the operations
into her calculator, “Is this right?”
    “Yup,” Keenan confirmed.
    Val wrote the result down. “Now what do I
do? Since the x isn’t by itself.”
    Alex smirked, “Well in that case the
problems unsolvable, sweety.”
    “Is that true?” Val looked between Keenan
and Carrie.
    “Of course not,” Keenan said, “You just
subtract the number on the same side as your x. In this case, that
would be the six-point-something. And then the result is your
answer.”
    Val did as he’d said; she compared her
answer to Carrie’s when she finished. “I got it!” she exclaimed, “I
actually got it! All by myself!”
    Alex broke into fits of
laughter; Keenan held back a grin, and even Carrie smiled. “Ok,
maybe it wasn’t all by myself,” Val admitted, “But I think I understand this
now.”
    “Well that’s good,” Alex
commented, half sarcastically and half humorously, “And here I was
worried we’d have to stay up till midnight helping you understand.”
He was right; Val’s clock read 12:07 . She had hardly been aware of
the passage of time, since she’d had so much fun joking around with
her friends. They’d only really settled down to work an hour
before, when the snacks Mom had brought up had all
disappeared.
    “Why are you worried about it being late? I
thought you’d be the last one to complain about being in my room at
night,” Val joked.
    “Yeah,” Alex replied, a smile spreading on
his face, “And that’s what I thought too. But then again, I was
imagining you with a lot less clothes on. And it would be only
us.”
    “Hey,” Keenan tried to efface a stern look,
“That’s my girl you’re talking to.”
    “There’d be mood lighting and rose petals
and you’d slip into something comfortable,” Alex continued.
    Val laughed, “But I’m
already in something comfortable.”
    “Yes, well those pants certainly don’t look
that comfortable to me. They’re too tight. Especially in back.”
    Keenan’s eyes widened, “Have you been
looking at Val’s ass, Alex?”
    “Oh yeah. Don’t tell me you haven’t. She’s
got a badonk.”
    Something about the
word badonk caused
them all to laugh uncontrollably. When Val regained control of
herself she said, “Well these pants really are comfortable. You
should try them.”
    Alex thought about it a moment. “Aren’t you
worried I’ll stretch them out?”
    Val shook her head.
    “Alright,” Alex said, “On one condition. If
I wear the pants you can’t put on a new pair.”
    “Why?” Val asked; it didn’t make sense.
    “Because I’m a perv and I wanna see you in
your underwear.” Alex laughed a little hard; it wasn’t that funny
of a joke. Carrie shifted uncomfortably.
    Val bit her lip, “Um, I don’t think I’m
gonna take you up on that. Anyways, it is getting late guys. Who
wants to call it a night and go our separate ways?”
    Carrie was all for it (“Just let me call my
parents”), and Keenan didn’t protest; Alex, however, seemed
reticent. “Just give us one more half hour,” he begged.
    “Why?” Val asked, “What is going to happen
in one more half hour that hasn’t already happened?”
    “We’ll find a party to go to.” Alex pulled
out his phone and sent several texts, “You can come along if