In Need of a Good Wife by Kelly O'Connor McNees

Harrison?
     

Dear Lucretia, How strange that I have come to think of you as “my own” when I have never laid eyes on your person! Is your hair fair? Since I was a boy I have stood firm that I should never marry unless the girl was very blond indeed. Until I receive your reply, I shall write to no other lady.
Ever yours,
Jeremiah Drake
Owner, Drake’s Brewery
. . .
     
Dear Mr. Drake, I will ask only one more time that you stop writing to me. I have changed my mind about this whole thing. Desist, sir.
Cordially,
Miss L. Blackstone

Dear Kathleen, You say you are skilled in caring for cows and pigs. How about goats? Specifically, I am wondering what to do about this billy who continues to find his way inside the house, though I can’t be sure how since I have bolted all the doors. He smells the way I imagine eternal damnation smells, but stronger still, and let me tell you that it is nothing pleasant to be jabbed in the leg by his horns. As I write, he is staring at me from my easy chair, where he is currently in repose. What am I to do, Kathleen? I pray for your arrival and for deliverance.
Beseechingly,
Amos Riddle
. . .
     
Mr. Riddle, What you must do is walk the nanny goat back and forth in front of the open door. If that doesn’t get him out, you can always shoot him. I’ll be there soon.
Yours,
Kathleen

My dear Anna, Though we have never had any acquaintance, I feel since reading your letters that we are intimate friends. I am so glad to know that you are fond of novels. I believe we will get on very well. I know that some men believe, clergymen in particular, that a novel will pollute a woman’s mind and encourage her to linger on our earthly tromp instead of loftier matters, but I disagree. What harm may come from a good story? Though Mr. Dickens at times lingers on scoundrels, should we not understand better from meeting them on the page why they turn away from God’s law? I have never spent better evenings than the ones in which I’ve followed Mr. Copperfield’s adventures.
Your thoughts on Wesley’s concept of prevenient grace are heartening, too, as I concur that it is surely a better rendering of Christ’s compassion than strict adherence to Calvinist doctrine. I have long hoped for a wife with whom I could examine and debate our theology.
I close hoping this letter may find you with the rose tint of good health glowing in your cheeks. Will the spring never come?
Yours,
Rev. Prentis Crowley

Dear Cynthia, I wanted to tell you before it slips my mind that I have never consumed a beet in my life and don’t intend to start now. If you are determined to cook beets, please stay in New York.
Regards,
Bill Albright

Dear Mr. Jeremiah Drake, Sir, I would describe the color of my hair as closer to an auburn, but it is a light auburn and lightens a great deal over the summer if I am working outdoors. I have enclosed a lock with this letter and await your opinion.
Yours,
Lillyann Martin
. . .
Dear Miss Martin, I am sorry but I must insist on a woman with blond hair, for what are we without our principles? This lock is darker than I hoped for. Please write to me if New York has a particularly sunny spring and your circumstances change.
Apologies,
Jeremiah Drake
Owner, Drake’s Brewery

Dear Miss Peale, I wonder, is your father originally of the Baltimore Peales? I ask because I too am interested in gas lighting using the horizontal rotative retort and should like very much to speak with him about a modification I have been working on for a few years now.
Fondly,
Stuart Moran
. . .
     
Dear Mr. Moran, Yes, those very Peales are my relations; however, due to a feud between my father and his uncle over the dispensation of a collection of spoons after my grandmother’s death, we no longer speak to that branch of the family. I wish I could offer you assistance.
Deborah Peale
. . .
     
Dear Miss Peale, What a terrible disappointment. I suppose you may still make the trip west, if you like.
Stuart

Dear