Losing the Ice (Ice Series #2) by Jennifer Comeaux Page A

transitioned into matching crossovers and gathered more speed, and we moved into position for the lift entry. I put my hand on Josh’s shoulder while he set his on my hip, and I waited for him to press me into the air.
    And waited… and waited…
    Josh’s chest puffed in and out in quick spurts, and a sheen of sweat covered his forehead. I reached up to touch his flushed cheek, but he dashed past me and grabbed onto the boards, facing away from the ice. I called his name and raced over to him.
    He bent his head, and his hands shook as he braced them on the boards. He was still breathing rapidly.
    What’s happening? Is he having a panic attack?
    I rubbed up and down his spine. “Try to take deep breaths.”
    He closed his eyes and slowly inhaled and exhaled. I kept massaging his back, and I gave Em and Sergei a wide-eyed look as they skated over to us.
    “Josh, what’s wrong?” Em asked.
    “I’m okay,” he whispered, but his head remained down.
    “Let’s go sit.” Em gently took his elbow.
    He carefully lifted his head and glided between Em and Sergei to the ice door. I followed, and we all sat on the bleachers.
    “What happened?” Sergei asked.
    Josh drank from his water bottle and wiped his glistening face with a towel. “My heart started beating really fast, and I couldn’t catch my breath.”
    “Have you felt that way any other time since you’ve been back on the ice?” Em asked.
    “No, it was just… just right now.”
    When we were about to do a lift for the first time since the accident.
    “Maybe we should take you to the ER to make sure you’re okay,” Em said.
    “I’m fine. I feel fine now,” Josh insisted.
    “I had a panic attack once,” I said. “I felt the same way… like I couldn’t breathe. I almost passed out.”
    Em put her hand on Josh’s arm. “You don’t have to be nervous. You’ve trained these lifts for so long. Trust in that training.”
    Josh didn’t say anything, and Sergei asked, “Do you want to try doing it again?”
    Josh stared at the ice for a long minute, and he only gave a quiet nod in reply. We returned to the ice, and I stood in front of him so he’d have to look at me.
    “Hey,” I said softly and grasped his waist. “I trust you. Completely.”
    He held my gaze momentarily and then took one of my hands. With a quick push of his blades, he urged us across the ice. I followed his lead and tracked my steps with his.
    As we did crossovers around the rink, Josh’s grip on my hand became clammy, and I watched him closely. He was visibly breathing hard again. He squeezed my hand tighter, and the shakiness of his arm vibrated mine. He was not okay.
    I started to say his name, but he let go of me before I could finish. He turned and hunched forward with his hands on his thighs. I had visions of him passing out right there on the ice.
    I put my arm around him and quickly steered him to the boards, away from the skater traffic. He bent all the way forward so his elbows rested on the wooden barrier.
    “We don’t have to do this now.” I smoothed my palm along the back of his T-shirt.
    Em began to move toward us, but I signaled for her to give us space. The other pairs gave us concerned looks as they continued their training around us.
    When Josh eventually stood tall, I saw how sweat-soaked his face was. He looked as if he had done an entire program run-through.
    “I’m sorry,” he said.
    “There’s nothing to be sorry for. You’re doing the best you can.”
    “I should be able to do better. I want to do better. I just can’t…” He clenched his fingers in his hair. “I keep feeling the sensation of my feet slipping and you falling.”
    “That was a fluke thing. You’ve done thousands of lifts perfectly.”
    “I know, but all I can see is that one. That horrible one.”
    The pain of the memory showed in his eyes, and I didn’t know how to erase it. All I could do was remind him he could lean on me anytime he needed. I wrapped him in a long hug