Loving Laura (The Cantrelle Family Trilogy) by Patricia Kay

was nothing comfortable about Neil Cantrelle. The way he looked at her, the things he said to her—everything about him was unsettling. She had a feeling he would never be undemanding, whether it was in his everyday relationships or as a lover.
    Now, where did that come from?
    Carefully, she explored the thought. Remembering the dark, questing look in his eyes, those eyes that hinted of sadness and disillusion, and the curve of his sensual mouth, she could feel herself blushing. Blushing, for God’s sake.
What’s wrong with you? This is a totally unsuitable train of thought, so get it out of your mind. Neil Cantrelle is your future fiance’s brother, and you’d better not think about him any other way. Ever.
    But her disturbing thoughts refused to go away, and even as she slipped into sleep, she was seeing the shape of Neil Cantrelle’s mouth and wondering what it would feel like pressed against her own.
    * * *
    “Neil!”
    Alice Kendella’s gray eyes widened in shock as she stared at Neil through the screened door.
    “Hello, Alice,” he said quietly, his manner belying the tension in his body.
    She put her hand to her mouth, and he could see how it trembled. “Oh, Neil,” she breathed.
    “Aren’t you going to ask me in? Or am I persona non grata?”
    “Don’t be crazy! Of course, you can come in!” She flung the screened door wide and opened her arms.
    Heart full, Neil gathered the diminutive blonde in his arms. She smelled like talcum powder and soap, and he hugged her hard. When they broke apart, she had tears in her eyes.
    “Neil, I’m so happy to see you.” She took his hand. “Come in. Let’s shut this door. It’s cold out there.”
    Drawing him forward, she pulled him into a cluttered living room. The room was as familiar to Neil as the rooms in his family’s home. He’d been here so many times.
    “Let’s go back into the kitchen. I was feeding the kids an early supper,” Alice said in her breathy voice. He had always teased Jimmy, saying that Alice sounded just like Marilyn Monroe.
    “That sexy little voice must be a real turn-on,” he would say, laughing when Jimmy would blush.
    His heart turned over as they entered the warm kitchen and he saw Jimmy, Jr., a good-looking ten-year-old with carroty hair who had his father’s coloring and his mother’s features; and Lisa, a smaller version of her mother, whose five-year-old eyes showed no recognition of him.
    “Hey, Jimmy, how’s it going?” Neil ruffled the boy’s hair, and Jimmy smiled happily. Neil’s heart warmed. The kid remembered him and seemed happy to see him.
    “How about some coffee? Do you want some soup?” Alice said.
    Neil glanced at the kids’ bowls. Vegetable soup. “Is it homemade?” He remembered her homemade soups and how good they always were.
    Alice nodded.
    “I shouldn’t. I ate a big plate of lasagna not three hours ago.” He grinned. “But I will anyway.”
    While she dished up his soup, he glanced around. He’d always loved this homey kitchen. It was so unlike the sterile whiteness of the one in his and Erica’s apartment. Of course, Erica never cooked, and the kitchen was too small to hold a table, so he told himself it didn’t matter.
    Instead, he spent as much time as he could in Jimmy’s kitchen, surrounded by Jimmy’s wife and kids. With or without Erica. He touched the table, smiling at the grooves in the soft wood—grooves made by kids’ spoons and kids’ pencils. Grooves made with love.
    As Alice seated herself opposite him, her quiet gray eyes met his, and she smiled.
    There had been a thick knot inside him ever since he’d said goodbye to Jimmy that sweltering August day when they’d lowered the bronze coffin into the ground. The first part of the knot unraveled today when he knelt over Jimmy’s grave. Now the last part came undone at the sight of Alice’s loving smile and the lack of blame he saw in her eyes. Warmth and something that almost resembled happiness crept through