to be the hostess in the group meetings, ensuring everyone had coffee.”
Heidi raised her head in surprise. “So, I like for everyone to be happy. So what?”
Marisa shook her head and put her mouth near Heidi’s ear. “As they have for years, your family takes advantage of you. Or rather, you allow them take advantage of you. Say no to their whining, unending, unreasonable requests! Take charge of your own life, Heidi, and you won’t need the liquor! Just try it!”
Tears fell down her face as Heidi shook her head and pulled her hand away. She leaped to her feet, knocked over her chair, and dashed out of the room.
Marisa half rose from her seat, then sat down. She wanted to help Heidi. On the other hand, being around Heidi could jeopardize her own sobriety. She decided to call Heidi later. Perhaps she could offer support over the phone, without taking the chance of messing up her own hard work in staying sober.
Marisa felt the vague, niggling sensation of someone watching her. Looking up and across the circle, she caught the dark molasses eyes of William.
She repressed a slight, involuntary shudder. She’d been in the small group setting with William on previous occasions. Now, however, she went out of her way to never be in a small group with him ever again. The small setting, outside the larger meeting, was meant to offer a therapeutic environment of open, caring support.
Marisa felt able to offer compassion to everyone she’d ever met in the group...except William.
In the small group several months before, William had shared his conviction years ago for molesting his little step-daughter. Although he had stated that he wanted to overcome his addiction and never commit his crimes again, he had admitted he still felt attracted to children.
Marisa couldn’t bear to speak to him or be near him.
Fred, his wide blue eyes puzzled in his perpetually worried face, raised a hand. “Hi, I’m Fred, and I’m an addict. What the heck is a blog? Sounds like some kind of a marshy swampland, but that doesn’t make any sense.” He tugged on the edge of his shirt, which had been in the midst of creeping up his protruding belly.
Cindy answered, “It’s a web log.”
Fred ran a wrinkled hand over his sparse hair. The lines at the corners of his eyes deepening, Fred looked more confused. “A spider in a pile of wood?”
In spite of her evident distress, Cindy smiled. “No, it’s an online diary. Web as in world wide web. Log as in captain’s log. A web log is a blog.”
Fred’s eyes rolled in his face. “Don’t you know the cardinal rule, young lady? Never ever put anything in writing!” he admonished.
Noticing lots of heads bobbing agreement all around the circle, Marisa decided the group was getting off track. “Regardless of should have or should not have, Cindy did. Now, I think she needs to think about what she wants in the future. I believe there are friends and family of us addicts who let us get away with too much! They stay with us when we cheat. They may say they stay because of religion. Or because of the children. Or whatever. If we had a therapist in here with us, he’d probably say that family members who stay with us in spite of our inappropriate behavior are ‘enabling’.”
Fred shuddered. “I hate the word enabling! You might as well say ‘doormat’ as say ‘enabler’! I think we need the people who love us to draw the lines in the sand...to say, they are not going to put up with us cheating or drinking or overspending...whatever our addiction may be.”
Janine raised her hand, causing the loose flesh hanging on her arm like a bat wing to sway. Several months ago, she had announced she was having stomach banding surgery. Now, after her rapid weight loss, she was smaller, but her skin was not catching up to her new body size. “Hi, I’m Janine, I’m an addict. I betrayed my husband, but not with a man. Or a woman,” she added, mindful of the alternative sexualities in the