and get him some sugar then. And anything else that might help. You know dogs, Eva.â
I took the money. That bleeding Enemy. You never know where you are with her. First she wants to kick that poor little sod and his dog out in the street, and next sheâs buying the dog sugar for her tea. She just ainât stable â thatâs whatâs wrong with her. Her mental attitudeâs all up the bleeding spout.
So I trotted off to Hanifâs, which is open all hours, and as I went I hummed to myself, âAnna Lee, The Enemy, She wanted to shit, then she wanted to pee. She changed her mind at half past three.â
I was feeling pretty pleased with myself, having got my own way again. All you need is willpower. You can even make things rhyme with willpower.
âHee-hee-hee, Anna Lee,â I sang to meself, and then Crystal came up behind me and grabbed my elbow.
âFuckinâ
ow
!â I said, because my elbow was all bruised.
âSorry,â Crystal said. âWhatâs happening, Eva? I looked out me window and there you was busting into the Premises.â
Which reminded me.
âThose bleeding premises,â I said. âI thought that was supposed to be my gym. I thought you said you was renting.â
âI never,â she said. âI said you would have it rent free.â
âMe and everyone else,â I said. âItâs a bleeding squat now.â
âHow?â
âThereâs a kid and his dog in there.â
âCanât you get them out?â Crystal asked. âAnd whoâs that other woman youâre with?â
âThatâs Anna Lee of Lee-Schiller Security.â
âWhoâs that when itâs at home?â
âSecurity,â I said. âLike me. Taking care of empty property.â
âOh shit,â she said.
âYeah. Your
âpremisesâ
. My gym.â
âDoes she know?â
âYou think Iâm stupid or what?â
âWhat she going to do, then?â Crystal said. âTurf this kid out?â
âOver my dead body,â I said. âHis dogâs just about to drop her litter.â
âPuppies?â Crystal said, her little monkey-face all screwed up. âYou mean this Lee personâs letting this kid stop in our premises for a load of puppies?â
âShe ainât,â I said. âBut I am. That bitch didnât ought to be moved.â
âLee?â
âNo, stupid. The fucking dog.â
âOh,â said Crystal. Honestly, she gets on my nerves.
I went on, and Crystal scurried along behind me.
At Hanifâs I bought sugar, eggs and milk. Theyâre all good for sick dogs. You got to separate the eggs though. You donât want to give a dog white of egg, only the yolk. I got some more tea bags too because Queenie looked like she was going to have a long night of it.
Crystal tagged along on the way back too. She said, âWhat we going to do?â
âWhat you mean â
we
?â
âUs,â she said. âYou. Me. Bella and the girls.â
âDonât you lump me in with that lot,â I said. Which shut her up.
Back at the Premises, The Enemy had rigged the light a bit better, and the kidâs pan of water was boiling. I dumped the shopping down and said, âThis lotâs for Queenie. Not for you.â
âI know,â the kid said. âThanks.â
âWell,â I said. âYou can have the egg whites, I suppose. Queenie donât want them. She gets the yolks, mind.â
âYes,â he said. âYouâre very kind.â He was a bit bloody polite for a squatter. I didnât trust him.
âWhip an egg yolk up in the milk and let her drink it,â I told him.
He was squatting over his stove, making the tea in a plastic bowl. He spooned some sugar in. I stood there making sure he didnât nick any for himself.
The Enemy stopped looking at the kid and saw